Don't hurt yourself just by remembering the past hurts.

Psychologist Jun Mee Kyung shares how to overcome past traumas - Photo: HO LAM

On the morning of March 2, at Nguyen Hue bookstore, the book launch took place: Stop Hurting Yourself and Because You Are Stronger Than You Think by author Jun Mee Kyung, a Korean doctor specializing in mental health.

With two newly released works, the author wants to send readers messages about believing in themselves, how to heal the past, live well in the present and move towards a better future.

Let bygones be bygones

During her treatment of many patients, Dr. Jun Mee Kyung realized that people with psychological trauma tend to care more about their past selves than their present selves.

When she wrote Because You Are Stronger Than You Think , tragedy struck. Her parents left her and passed away.

Jun Mee Kyung wrote Because You Are Stronger Than You Think in memory of her deceased parents.

Jun Mee Kyung confided that what she wrote in the book was what she wanted to say to herself at that time.

"There were days when I wrote and cried. At that time, I was as limp as cotton soaked in water, no longer knowing sadness, joy, resentment, or anger. I dug up the unfilial things I had done to my parents in the past and then regretted and blamed myself," she recalled.

And her mood at that time was similar to the symptoms of the patients she treated.

They usually have the following three symptoms:

First, they live in the past or keep gnawing at the wounds.

They think that a past event has caused them to suffer in the present, and then they sink into self-pity.

Second, they wonder why they are so miserable and then dig deeper into their own problems, the more they dig, the more sad and insecure they become.

Third, they feel completely empty and don't understand why they exist. They lose the ability to find meaning and value in life.

According to her, we cannot avoid times when we feel tormented by the past, but we should only think about it once and then let it go. What has passed, let it go.

Because if you keep gnawing at those wounds and linking them to your current life, it will only make things worse.

It is our job to try to live more meaningfully in the present and in the future.

Because what we face in the present will be the deciding factor in whether or not past hurts can be healed.

False self-esteem will make you waver

In the book Stop Hurting Yourself, Dr. Jun Mee Kyung writes about true self-esteem and false self-esteem.

In addition to constantly tormenting themselves with past pains, people with mental illness also tend to compare themselves with others in many aspects of study, work welfare, and personal life.

Author Jun Mee Kyung signs books for readers - Photo: HO LAM

Then they think about their own abilities and think that they are always inferior to everyone.

According to Jun Mee Kyung, that is the biggest thing that makes a person lose his self-esteem.

In Korea, there are many treatments for this psychological problem.

But the most important solution is that each person needs to be aware of their own abilities and avoid comparing themselves with others and should not be too eager for recognition.

In addition, we need to understand ourselves well so as not to be complacent or have overconfidence based on self-deception.

Because that is just false self-esteem.

Jun Mee Kyung is the author of two books, Stop Hurting Yourself and Because You Are Stronger Than You Think, with more than 120,000 copies published in Korea and Thailand.

She is also a mental health practitioner, currently the director of Goodmorning Mental Health Clinic and a visiting professor at Dan Kook University.

Jun Mee Kyung is the main author of several books such as: Your Love is Like You, Teaching Humanities on the Way to Work and proofreading books on children's psychology such as: It's Okay, It's Okay , Emotion Dictionary for Children ...

Source: https://tuoitre.vn/dung-lam-minh-dau-chi-vi-cu-nho-mai-nhung-thuong-ton-trong-qua-khu-20240302014433797.htm