The principal must be tolerant.

Báo Thanh niên•13/12/2023

Recently, the incident involving students at Van Phu Secondary School (Son Duong district, Tuyen Quang province ) cornering a teacher and using foul language has caused widespread public outrage and indignation. I believe that the school principal may have been lax in management and lacked empathy for colleagues and students.

I would like to share my experience as a teacher to demonstrate that if principals are approachable, attentive, empathetic, and tolerant of teachers, staff, and students, school violence will be minimized, contributing to the creation of a happy school environment.

The principal yells and shouts, and the teacher is disrespected by the students.

I used to teach at a private school in Ho Chi Minh City. Every weekday morning, if students didn't line up properly or talked while queuing for class, the vice principal would immediately use the loudspeaker to reprimand the homeroom teacher.

The principal and vice-principal, upon discovering any class was noisy, would immediately storm into the classroom and yell at the students and even the teachers: "What kind of teaching is this? The classroom is like a marketplace!" or "Do I pay you teachers to work like this?"

Ứng xử văn minh trong học đường: Yếu tố tiên quyết là hiệu trưởng phải bao dung - Ảnh 1. — The principal needs to share the burden with teachers and students.

The school administration's behavior has led many students to disrespect their teachers. Students argue with teachers on a daily basis, and many even verbally abuse and physically assault them...

The principal never raises his voice at the teachers.

Later, I transferred to a public school and was fortunate enough to meet a principal who was dedicated to education , treated teachers and staff with kindness and reason, and deeply cared for the students. My principal never raised her voice at teachers or students, yet everyone respected her and dared not do anything wrong.

In my first year, I was assigned to be the homeroom teacher for a 12th-grade class with many students who were academically weak and frequently violated school rules and discipline. During one instance of disciplining students, in a fit of anger and lack of composure, I hit a male student several times with a cane.

Upon learning of the incident, the principal called me into his office, gently analyzed the mistake I had made, and then asked me to write a commitment not to repeat it. What impressed me most was that the principal did not criticize me at the teachers' council meeting. This was also a way for me to save face as a teacher.

When I was the team leader managing 15 teachers, I initially felt uneasy because one teacher lacked strong professional skills and expertise despite having years of teaching experience. My colleagues sensed this and shared their concerns with the principal.

The principal met with me and said that since my colleagues lacked expertise and professional skills, I had to guide them step-by-step with my experience, enthusiasm, and sincerity in order to demonstrate the role, responsibility, and leadership qualities of a team leader.

I heeded the principal's advice and persistently provided feedback on lesson plans and teaching materials to help my colleagues. After just one year, my colleagues improved significantly and became much more confident in their teaching. Without the principal's dedicated guidance, my behavior towards my colleagues would certainly have been worse.

During a discussion with the principal about teacher policies, the leader said I misunderstood the issue. But I disagreed, and even unfriended the principal on Zalo.

Ứng xử văn minh trong học đường: Yếu tố tiên quyết là hiệu trưởng phải bao dung - Ảnh 2. — Sharing and tolerance are key elements that contribute to civilized behavior in the school environment.

The principal calmly sent me a friend request. When we met at lunch, the principal jokingly said that I was still "childish" and didn't take it to heart. Thanks to this comment, along with the principal's tolerant attitude, I have matured a great deal.

Based on my own experience, I believe that a principal who listens, empathizes, and shows tolerance towards teachers and students is a crucial element in fostering civilized behavior in the school environment.

Patience is needed from the teacher.

School violence can stem from many causes, but first and foremost, it originates from the teacher. Teachers' unprofessional methods of punishment (fines, verbal abuse, expulsion from class, etc.) can anger and shame students. Students may even retaliate by hitting or cursing back, becoming afraid to attend class and instead confiding in others online, requesting a change of teacher, or seeking parental intervention.

Some teachers bring their family frustrations into the classroom, venting their anger on a few problematic students, causing the entire class to suffer. Or teachers treat students unfairly, showing favoritism to those who attend extra classes or whose parents show extra interest in the teachers during holidays and festivals…

Another reality is the mindset of "leaving everything to the teacher" from parents, which makes it difficult for teachers to teach.

For example, subject teachers dedicate their hearts and creativity to each lesson, but students still focus on one subject over another, brazenly studying material from other subjects (or skipping class to study other subjects). Feeling offended, some teachers invite parents to school to discuss and find ways to educate their children. At that point, the teachers receive responses that feel like a slap in the face: "I allow them to focus on one subject. How else would they get into university?"

Furthermore, when students violate ethical standards or engage in fights, some parents blame the homeroom teacher for not being attentive enough, then request a transfer to another class or school. If students don't study, don't prepare lessons, joke around, or are disrespectful during class and are punished, parents come to the school to yell at or even assault teachers. If students don't achieve the title of excellent or advanced student, parents suggest that their children file a complaint with the school administration.

Previously, while working at a private school, I taught a class with many students who systematically misbehaved, disrespected teachers, weren't afraid of discipline, expulsion, or having their grades lowered. They frequently made noise, used foul language, didn't take notes, and of course, they weren't afraid of writing self-criticism reports or having their parents called in.

Some subject teachers choose a conciliatory approach, turning a blind eye, letting students who are willing to learn do so, overlooking mistakes and ignorance for the sake of safety. Others simply cry, and after a short time, they quit teaching; some teachers who are still dedicated to their profession will reprimand, punish, discipline, and invite parents.

Many days, I was so angry I could barely speak, but I had to restrain myself from saying anything unprofessional or offensive to the students. For days after teaching, wherever I went, I was always troubled by the students' misconduct, constantly thinking about how to handle it appropriately and reasonably, in a way that would positively impact the class.