This was a wrong decision!

Previously, every time my son-in-law came home from work, he would greet me with a few words, but later he just walked past as if he didn't see me, speaking curtly, only saying "um" and "uh".

At a certain stage in life, elderly people all need the care of their children and grandchildren. Some people don't have sons but only daughters, and if they want their children to take care of them, they naturally need the consent of their son-in-law, if the son-in-law is married and has his own life. This is similar to the case of Mrs. Tô, a 73-year-old woman.

After careful consideration, Mrs. Tô decided to go to her daughter's house to enjoy her old age, but after less than three months, she sadly returned to her hometown.

Mrs. Tô recounted:

I've always been independent. My husband passed away over twenty years ago, and I've lived alone in my hometown ever since. But as I get older and my health declines, I feel very lonely and helpless.

Lately, my health has been deteriorating, with frequent chest pain and shortness of breath. I think I could pass away at any moment, and I fear I won't be able to see my daughter one last time.

So I thought: Maybe I should go live with my daughter in my old age, being close to my children would make life more convenient.

Besides, I have over 30 million VND in savings, so I can comfortably help my child with some expenses.

I called my daughter and son-in-law to ask for their opinions. My daughter has always been worried about me living alone in the countryside, so when she heard about this, she immediately agreed. My son-in-law was also willing to welcome his mother-in-law to live with us because we've always had a very good relationship.

Not wanting my children to think of their elderly mother as a burden, I proactively took responsibility for grocery shopping and cooking meals every day. This way, when they come home from work, they always have hot meals ready to eat.

My son-in-law thanked me profusely, saying that having me live with them and cook meals meant they no longer felt rushed and hurried after work. However, not long after, I noticed that my son-in-law gradually became more distant from me.

Having lived in the countryside for many years, I'm really bad at remembering addresses and finding my way, and I don't usually like to talk much.

After moving to the city to live with my children, apart from going to the market and cooking meals, I mostly stay at home listening to music on the radio and watching plays on TV.

My son-in-law comes home from work, sometimes he lies on the sofa watching TV, other times he plays games in the study.

Everything was fine, then one day my daughter reminded me not to turn the radio up too loud, because the two kids were too tired to listen to it after work, and my son-in-law was visibly annoyed.

I also tried turning the music down, but the elderly person with hearing loss couldn't hear it, so they habitually turned it up louder. My daughter reminded me several times, so I got annoyed and turned off the music player.

Then, I had to promise not to turn on the radio when the children were home before my daughter gave it back to me. But within just one month of living together, my son-in-law's attitude towards me had gotten worse and worse.

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Previously, every time my son-in-law came home from work, he would greet me with a few words, but later he just walked past as if he didn't see me, speaking curtly, only saying "um" and "uh".

Confused, I asked my daughter and learned that my son-in-law "disliked" me because he was bothered every evening after work and on weekends. I remembered that I often reminded him to do some housework, and even asked him to help carry things and fix broken items for my friends who lived in the same apartment building. My son-in-law was resentful that after a tiring day at work, he was still being ordered around.

I'm a little disappointed by my son-in-law's behavior. Back in my hometown, neighbors always helped each other out when they were in trouble; it was a reciprocal arrangement, so when I faced difficulties, others would also lend a helping hand. When my son-in-law helped my friends fix their plumbing or carry heavy things, they always thanked him with a bunch of vegetables or some fruit...

But since my son-in-law isn't my biological son, I couldn't bring myself to tell him my thoughts. Later, when they asked for my help, I refused, so as not to bother him. My friends gradually distanced themselves from me, which saddened me greatly, but I had no choice.

Despite my efforts to adapt to my children's lives and to change my own views and lifestyle, my son-in-law still holds a prejudice against me.

My health isn't good, and I have to go to the hospital for checkups regularly. My daughter is often away on business, so I usually ask my son-in-law to drive me to the hospital. I pay for the checkups and medication myself. I often reimburse him for the gas money. However, many times when I needed to go to the hospital for a checkup, I knocked on his door but didn't hear him. I knew he was inside, he just didn't say anything.

I had no choice but to take a taxi to the hospital by myself, traveling a long distance alone, and having to take a number and wait, which made me feel extremely sad and dejected.

When I got home, my daughter saw that I had gone to the hospital alone and got angry, scolding her husband. My son-in-law just said, "Why did you have to go to the hospital with Mom?"

My son looked at me and continued, "I don't want to go. Before Grandma came along, I had so much free time every weekend. But now I don't even have time to rest. I'm already tired from work, and now I have to deal with this."

My daughter got angry and yelled at her husband even louder. I sat there not knowing what to do. I didn't want the two of them to clash because of me, so all I could do was advise her to calm down.

"This is nothing serious. Mom can go to the hospital alone. You shouldn't blame your husband like that."

Sitting on the sofa reflecting on the past three months, I realized that my decision to move to my daughter's nursing home was a mistake. My presence had, to some extent, hindered my children's lives. A few days later, I told my daughter that I wanted to go back to my hometown.

My daughter asked me if I wasn't used to living in the city. I kept shaking my head, saying that I missed the neighbors back home and that I would come back to visit them sometime.

My son-in-law, upon hearing that I had returned to my hometown, became much more friendly and even offered to drive me to the hospital for a check-up. He said some harsh things earlier, and hoped I wouldn't take it to heart. I didn't dwell on my son-in-law's negative attitude towards me; I only blamed myself for being old and causing trouble for my children.

My children are grown up and have their own lives, so even though they love me, I should try not to become a burden to them, unless it's absolutely impossible. Now I understand that my own home is still the most comfortable place, even though it's a little lonely, it offers freedom and independence.

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/me-gia-73-tuoi-den-nha-con-gai-duong-lao-nhung-ngam-ngui-ve-que-chi-sau-3-thang-vi-khuc-mac-voi-con-re-day-la-mot-quyet-dinh-sai-lam-172241126160529273.htm