Don't judge, create barriers.

SGGP 06/03/2023 13:36

During the school year's farewell season, young people who have not yet grown up sign their names on shirts, throw colored powder, attend Prom parties (abbreviation of Promenade, of Western origin, a party held at the end of the school year) in sexy dresses, take pictures, kiss and... propose.

Unlimited Performances

These days, whether in the schoolyard or on social media, there are many images of students hugging each other like lovers, male students carrying female students, even kneeling down to propose and kiss each other in front of many people. The most "viral" (popularity) of this year's graduation season is the proposal of a pair of 12th grade students at a high school in Vinh Phuc , the male student holding a bouquet of flowers approached the female student amid the cheers and applause of his classmates, then knelt down to put a ring on the female student. Everyone around cheered: Kiss!

The viral image of a pair of 12th grade students from a high school in Vinh Phuc at the closing ceremony

The schoolyard, which is meant for graduation ceremonies, gratitude, and coming of age, is quickly turned into a place for adults, blatantly doing things that are not for students, nor appropriate in public.

If showing off at school is a light level, then at Prom parties it must be at a higher “level”. These night parties will witness the sudden transformation of people who think they are mature because they have graduated, are tall and radiantly beautiful. They freely dye their hair, wear makeup, dress revealingly, hug, kiss, smoke, drink alcohol… which just a few days before were still labeled as students and were prohibited. Maturity is demonstrated hastily and hastily.

Ms. Pham Thi Quynh (Thu Duc City, Ho Chi Minh City) wondered: “I am not old yet, and I consider myself open-minded in many ways, but I am still not used to seeing 12th graders being bold, affectionate, and then proposing at graduation ceremonies. I really don’t know how far the limits of public actions go?”

Faced with this reality,educational psychologists say that adolescents have a characteristic of wanting to prove themselves and be recognized, so adults must create clear boundaries so that children do not "cross the line".

Mature and respectful

There is an eternal contradiction that adults find strange, but children find it strange and don’t mind. This contradiction cannot be eliminated because each person and generation has a different view of limits. Instead of criticizing, help children realize that expressing privacy is both a very serious and sensitive matter.

Education Master Nguyen Ho Thuy Anh, lecturer at the John Robert Powers School of Talent and Character Development, explains: Teenage love cannot be banned, but expressing love by hugging, kissing and proposing to each other in school cannot be encouraged. Even international schools still have regulations that prohibit excessive expressions of affection on school grounds. According to Master Thuy Anh, it is time for schools to have regulations on expressing intimate gestures and actions in the school environment.

Master Pham Le Thanh is a young teacher at Nguyen Hien High School (District 11, Ho Chi Minh City), always looking for ways to attract students to love the subject and youth experience activities, frankly expressing: There should be limits in the school environment. “Beauty always needs to be admired by many people, I often call them fans. Young people today are exposed to many singers, idols, and romance novels, so they are influenced. To me, this is not bad, but students need to be shown whether the environment at that time is really suitable for this expression. For example, at the graduation ceremony, everyone wears uniforms because that is the last time in the life of a 12th grade student to wear a pure white shirt, then we should have uniformity, avoid dressing to create individuality”, Master Thanh said.

MSc. Thuy Anh gives advice: 12th grade students, around 17-18 years old, are adults. Being an adult means learning to respect everyone around them. Therefore, if your actions and gestures affect others, they need to stop. Schools need to have regulations that discourage or prohibit inappropriate behaviors, that is how schools are educating students to respect - a necessary trait for all circumstances and environments.

Mr. Minh Luan, a parent at Saigon Practical High School (District 5, Ho Chi Minh City), shared: “When we were in school, everyone had a crush on someone. At every class reunion later, we often talked about the regrets of not daring to confess or hold hands with the girl at the same table. So we should not judge the kids harshly if they do not go too far. Instead of condemning, I often invite my two sons to a coffee shop to find a way to talk and communicate so that they do not go too far.”

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