The broken bowl and the special lesson General Hoang Dan taught his son.

Major General Hoang Dan and his wife - Family photo.

That's the story told by Mr. Hoang Nam Tien - the youngest son of Major General Hoang Dan and National Assembly representative Nguyen Thi An Vinh - at the launch of his book "Letters to You" on the afternoon of April 13th in Hanoi . The book launch attracted a large number of attendees, especially young people.

The story of the broken bowl is also recounted by Mr. Tien in his book "Letters to My Dear" - a book he wrote about his parents' love story through more than 400 letters they sent to each other during the decades they were separated due to war, which the family still keeps.

General Hoang Dan - an extraordinary husband and father.

Mr. Hoang Nam Tien recounted that in 1972, he was only three years old. During a family meal before his father left for the campaign, little Tien (nicknamed Hai) dropped a Hai Duong porcelain bowl, considered precious during the extremely difficult wartime and subsidy period. The three-year-old boy was terrified and on the verge of tears.

Mr. Hoang Nam Tien (center) emotionally recounts stories about his parents at the book launch of "Letters to My Child" - Photo: T. DIEU

Seeing this, "Dan's father" picked up his porcelain bowl and dropped it to the ground. The bowl shattered. After the sound of the bowl breaking came the hearty laughter of both father and son.

Not stopping there, Mr. Hoang Dan went to the cupboard and took out four more Hai Duong porcelain bowls, dropping them one by one to elicit the cheerful laughter of his young child.

This was a crucial difference between the three, leaving Mr. Tien with a valuable lesson in raising children. With his children, General Hoang Dan taught carefully, disciplined strictly, but was also incredibly gentle and loving.

Mr. Tien recounted that every summer his father would take him to his father's military camp to live with the soldiers.

Therefore, by the age of 10-11, Mr. Tien already knew how to shoot various types of guns, knew how to drive a car by the age of 12, and knew how to provide first aid to the sick and injured...

Not only was General Hoang Dan himself very warm and affectionate towards his children, but he also gently guided his wife, who had endured many hardships and was therefore somewhat strict, to be more caring and affectionate towards their children.

Images of Mrs. Nguyen Thi An Vinh in her youth, in her old age, with her husband and with her youngest son, Hoang Nam Tien - Family archives.

Mr. Tien recounted that his mother grew up in an extremely difficult environment (her family fell on hard times, forcing her to become a domestic servant when she was only 8 years old), so she was very strict with her children and with herself. Therefore, Mr. Tien's siblings grew up under their mother's strict upbringing.

Seeing this, "Dan's father" wrote a letter to his wife, asking if she cared about the children and if she was affectionate towards them.

It was 1962, when Hoang Dan was studying in the Soviet Union. In a letter to his wife, he told her about a story he had read about in a 1958 psychology study in America.

A baby monkey, recently orphaned, was placed in a room containing a stuffed monkey and a wooden monkey. The baby monkey ended up hugging only the stuffed monkey, not the wooden one.

The story shows that even monkeys want something warm and soft. Humans, of course, want the same.

Letters General Hoang Dan sent to his wife from the Soviet Union - Photo: T. DIEU

Since that letter, Tiến's mother changed a lot in how she raised her children. When she was pregnant with Tiến, she started stroking her belly to talk to the baby.

When Tiến was born, his mother frequently massaged his back and legs, and read the Tale of Kiều to her youngest son, a practice she continued until the very end of her life.

The general, who loved his soldiers, shouted angrily: "If you fight like this, the Vietnamese mothers won't be able to give birth fast enough!"

General Hoang Dan loved his wife and children with a tender and profound love, and he loved his soldiers with the same love, like an older brother and a father.

The Vi Xuyen front during the border war was extremely fierce, especially in 1984. So many of our soldiers sacrificed their lives, causing the old general, with his extensive battlefield experience, immense grief.

He angrily shouted at the commanders here: "If you keep fighting like this, the Vietnamese mothers won't be able to give birth fast enough!"

Mr. Tien recounted that throughout the years of war, his father always believed that for a commander, besides achieving victory, they must always remember that every fallen soldier was a son, a father, a brother... in a family.

A soldier falling in battle is a small loss, but for each family, it is an irreplaceable loss.

Therefore, when Mr. Tien went to Vi Xuyen, the soldiers told him stories about his father, who, despite having a leg injury, still used a rattan cane to walk into a cave just a few hundred meters from the enemy to encourage the troops.

Even when he was a brigadier general, he would still arrange ammunition boxes to sit with his soldiers in a very simple and friendly manner.

Source: https://tuoitre.vn/chiec-bat-vo-va-bai-hoc-dac-biet-ma-tuong-hoang-dan-day-con-20240413191926402.htm