Sad teenage song

VHO - Married at fifteen/My husband scorned me for being too small and refused to sleep with me. Regardless, early marriage, in any ethnic group, is considered undesirable from many perspectives, both physical and mental, for the individuals involved and for the community as a whole.

Teenage years, which refer to the age range from thirteen (thirteen) to nineteen (nineteen), are defined by various ethnic groups as the age of growth, adolescence, and immaturity for marriage.

A cultural officer friend once pointed out a small group of people from his ethnic group to me and asked, "Do you know why they are so small?" I casually replied, "Probably because they lack nutrition." Unexpectedly, he said, "No, it's because of child marriage!" He said it with bitterness. Only then did I truly understand the reality stemming from an ancient custom. Perhaps our people, whether Kinh or ethnic minorities, who appear so small and frail, are not simply "products" of child marriage (naturally coupled with malnutrition and lack of clothing) from generations past?

People in the past were certainly aware of the harm of child marriage, but other desires were stronger. For example, the desire to have someone to help with farming, someone to go to sea, a large family, and a marriage between families of equal social standing. The concept of matching social status was quite important among the Kinh people in the past. Some couples who loved each other had to sadly part ways because their families were not of equal social standing. Others who didn't love each other were married off and lived together for life, even if their personalities were incompatible.

The issue of dowry demands: Sometimes the bride's family demands such a high dowry that the groom's family is left with a large debt. Some grooms even intentionally wear old clothes to the wedding procession to show the bride's family what they look like! And in the case of child marriage among the Kinh people, the main culprit is often "matching social status": Parents from families of "descendant lineage" agree to marry their children together. Fortunately, after the August Revolution, this practice almost completely disappeared.

For ethnic minority communities in mountainous areas, the transformation of customs has been slower. In the 1990s, when we visited the Rhe River region, we still heard about many cases of child marriage. But gradually, the people realized the harm it caused them and abandoned it. However, for some reason, this backward custom has returned.

What a sad song for teenagers, sad for those working in the cultural field, and sad for society as a whole! Upon inquiry, it turns out there are quite a few cases where teenagers, due to the distance between schools and their homes, have to leave their families to attend boarding schools. Boys and girls live together on campus, only returning home to their families and villages occasionally. The school cannot manage all their activities, so they fall in love very early. And when they return home to "report" to their families and villages, it's already too late. The families have to comply, unaware that the law prohibits it.

Thus, in today's context, child marriage has another cause, not due to the parents, but due to living in isolation from the family. A completely unexpected reason. Therefore, the only option is to continue the propaganda and education by schools and society about the harmful effects of child marriage. Schools must also enhance their responsibility in managing students' activities.

Source: https://baovanhoa.vn/gia-dinh/khuc-nhac-buon-tuoi-teen-231319.html