Reduce stress and pressure during exam season.

As students enter the final stretch leading up to important exams, many parents are also anxious about the academic pressure their children are under.

Candidates and parents happily have lunch and rest at the Ho Chi Minh City School of Educational Management while waiting for the English exam of the 10th grade entrance exam in Ho Chi Minh City on June 1st - Photo: THAO THUONG

How can we support our children and alleviate stress and pressure during this crucial stage?

Unintentionally creating pressure

Ms. Thi Huong (An Hoi Dong ward, Ho Chi Minh City) said that for more than a month, her daughter has been preparing for the 10th grade entrance exam and has been almost entirely focused on studying. "Every night I remind her to go to bed early, but she says there are still many things she's unsure about and wants to study more. Some nights I wake up at 1 or 2 in the morning and still see the lights in her room on," she recounted.

Ms. Huong is not alone; many parents admit they frequently find themselves in a state of both pity and worry for their children. Pity because they see their children putting pressure on themselves to strive, and worry because prolonged late nights can affect their health and mental well-being.

"The older our children get, the less they confide in us. When asked about their studies, they answer briefly, often just saying, 'I know.' There are things they keep to themselves that my wife and I don't know about and can't share with them," Thanh Long (An Khanh ward) confided.

In the days leading up to exams, many families experience tense conversations. Parents want their children to rest and eat well to conserve energy, while the students want to make the most of their study time.

Differences in perspective sometimes put pressure on both sides. Mr. Minh Tuan (Duc Nhuan ward) recalls the time his daughter burst into tears during dinner when asked about her aspirations for 10th grade. "She said that everyone at school asked about exams all day, and even her father asked at home. That's when I realized I might be unintentionally adding more pressure on her," he shared.

Many parents find that adolescence causes their children to experience rapid emotional changes. Some days they are cheerful and talkative with their parents, but other times even a gentle reminder can upset them. This leaves many parents feeling confused.

What students need most during this period is the feeling that their family is always there for them. When they know they are loved and respected regardless of the outcome, the psychological pressure will be significantly reduced.

Prof. Dr. Huynh Van Son (Rector of Ho Chi Minh City University of Education)

We need to feel heard and understood.

According to educational psychology experts, what worries many parents during exam season is not only the results of the 10th grade or high school graduation exams, but also the changes in their children's communication style during adolescence. As exam pressure increases, many students tend to withdraw, share less, or react more sensitively to questions they perceive as tests or assessments.

Experts believe that at the age of 15-18, the need for personal space and the ability to solve problems independently is quite common. However, stress during exam preparation can cause children to become more withdrawn, making it difficult for parents to understand their feelings and provide effective support. Therefore, in addition to academic support, what many students need at this time is listening, understanding, and a sense of trust from their families.

Parents and their children after the 10th grade entrance exam in Ho Chi Minh City - Photo: DUYEN PHAN

Associate Professor Dr. Le Minh Cong - a psychology expert and Director of the Mental Health Research and Support Program at the University of Social Sciences and Humanities (Vietnam National University Ho Chi Minh City) - believes that students talking less or not wanting to share immediately after each exam is a fairly common reaction and does not mean that they do not need attention from their families.

According to him, after many hours of focused work under high pressure, students usually need time to rest and regain emotional balance before being ready to discuss the exam; this is a common way to cope with stress.

"Instead of constantly asking children how many questions they answered correctly, or whether the exam was difficult or easy, parents can start with empathetic questions or demonstrate active listening. At this time, emotional support is often more important than analyzing the exam results," Mr. Cong shared.

He also advised parents to avoid putting extra pressure on their children with judgmental questions or comparisons with peers. Reminders like "Friend A is better at studying," or "Keep trying or you won't get into your desired school," while well-intentioned, can inadvertently increase stress, anxiety, and fear of failure in students.

According to Mr. Cong, what students need most during exam periods is not the pressure to achieve perfect scores, but rather a feeling of being understood, accepted, and supported by their families. A safe psychological environment will help them maintain emotional stability, recover energy, and better perform their abilities in subsequent exams.

Not the only door that determines the future.

Parents encourage their children after the 10th grade entrance exam in Hanoi - Photo: PHUC TAI

According to Professor Huynh Van Son, Rector of Ho Chi Minh City University of Education, the 10th grade entrance exam is an important milestone, but it is not the only barrier or the sole gateway that determines a child's future.

Similarly, the upcoming high school graduation exam can be said to be the most important exam in a student's life, but it's necessary to look more at the challenges faced by young people themselves, because the opportunities for life, success, and happiness are quite diverse and abundant.

What parents need to instill in their children is trust and acceptance, regardless of the final outcome. Children always need understanding and empathy; support and sharing, not hope and expectations.

According to Mr. Son, in reality, many candidates and parents remained anxious throughout the exam period. Even today, ninth-grade students, who have finished their exams and are waiting for their scores, are still worried. "I empathize with their feelings," he said.

"Especially for young people, they should think of taking an exam as an official assessment of their own abilities, and not put prolonged pressure on themselves or make things difficult for themselves so that they can maintain psychological balance and carry out subsequent activities," Mr. Son said.

Exam support

Important exams only take place over a few days, but for many parents, it's a long period of sleepless nights, silently watching their children study, and anxiously waiting outside the school gates.

The pressure of exam season therefore rests not only on the shoulders of students but also on the unspoken anxieties of parents. For many, what worries them most is not the grades but the feeling of increasingly difficulty in understanding their children as they enter adulthood.

Psychologists believe that the calmness and understanding of parents are crucial pillars of support for students during exam season. A warm meal, timely encouragement, or simply the quiet companionship of family can sometimes be far more meaningful than pressure or expectations of achievement.

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TRAN HUYNH

Source: https://tuoitre.vn/giam-cang-thang-ap-luc-mua-thi-20260604093038369.htm