The fate of a "parasite"

Ms. Hong Nga, originally from Tien Giang province , married and lives in Can Tho City. Her marriage became strained after she quit her job to stay home and care for her children. Her husband often showed disrespect because she was no longer the primary breadwinner. Ms. Nga recounted: “I’ve been married for five years. For the first three years, we were very happy. Before, I was a seamstress with a stable income. My husband’s family owned a company that specialized in buying and selling fruit, so after giving birth to our second child, he advised me to quit my job and focus on the family. For the past two years, his business hasn’t been doing well, causing a change in his personality. He’s often irritable, and when he’s drunk, he even curses at his wife and children.”

Ms. Ngoc Thanh, originally from Hau Giang province , was formerly a contract English teacher; her husband was a construction contractor. After getting married, she moved to Can Tho City with her husband. At that time, her husband's business was thriving, so he advised her to quit her job and stay home to manage the household. For over eight years, Ms. Thanh was a diligent homemaker, caring for and raising three children so her husband could focus on his work. However, troubles began when her husband unfortunately fell seriously ill and passed away. Their family life was turned upside down. The children were of school age, while Ms. Thanh had no profession. The family's asset, their house, had to be mortgaged. "I don't know what to do to earn money to support my children, because my knowledge has become outdated and unusable. I'm not confident in finding work," Ms. Thanh shared.

Ms. Phuong, originally from Can Tho, is married to Mr. Tam, originally from Bac Lieu . Both attended the same prestigious university in Ho Chi Minh City. They admired each other for their academic achievements and active participation in extracurricular activities. After getting married, they settled in the city to build their careers. Mr. Tam started his own company, while Ms. Phuong became a university lecturer. Later, to allow her husband to focus on his career, Ms. Phuong stepped back to care for their two young children. Over time, as his business prospered, Mr. Tam opened more branches. It was then that he began an extramarital affair with a female employee at the provincial branch. Although fully aware of the situation, Ms. Phuong, due to her two children and her financial dependence on her husband, could only silently suffer, not daring to confront him or definitively end the marriage. Thus, she lived like a shadow beside her husband in a marriage of "sleeping in the same bed, dreaming different dreams."

Mr. Hai, from Can Tho City, and his wife, Ms. L, have been married for eight years and have two children, a boy and a girl. Mr. Hai works for a food company. Previously, Ms. L also worked, but after getting married, she quit her job to stay home and focus on caring for her husband and children. On the surface, everyone thought they were happy and harmonious, but only those involved knew the truth. Because she stayed home for so long, Ms. L became excessively jealous, especially of men who interacted with her husband. Knowing his wife's jealous nature, Mr. Hai behaved appropriately. He thought that being tolerant would preserve their happiness, but Ms. L's jealousy only worsened. Recently, Ms. L unexpectedly stormed into the shop and caused a scene while Mr. Hai was preparing to sign a contract with a partner, causing him both embarrassment and the loss of the contract. Unable to tolerate his wife's jealousy any longer, Mr. Hai filed for divorce.

According to psychologists, as long as women remain dependent, inequality persists, making it difficult to foster a happy marriage. Therefore, regardless of circumstances, women should have stable jobs. It doesn't need to be a grand career; as long as it's a job they enjoy and that suits them, allowing them to confidently integrate into society and modern life, they should no longer think of living a life of complacency, dependence, or entrusting their happiness to their partner.

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