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Failing an exam is just "success delayed"

Every year, every exam season, there are many heartbreaking stories about students who fail the exam. Some students commit suicide just because they lacked half a point to get into a specialized school; some students leave home and wander because they cannot get into a public high school...

Báo Phụ nữ Việt NamBáo Phụ nữ Việt Nam10/07/2025

Many children, after overcoming the shock, shared that partly they felt disappointed in themselves, partly they were afraid of being scolded by their parents, and partly they were worried about affecting the family's honor...

Loving their children, the community also raised the issue of how parents should behave when their children pass the exam with flying colors and when their children fail. Recently, on the group "What to eat and where to stay in Long Bien", nick Vu Phuong Linh shared a story posted on social networks.

When she returned from selling goods, around 12:30, she saw a child in lane 108 Tran Phu walking to Mo Lao park, the child was crying as he walked. Sensing something was wrong, this person asked about the child and he burst into tears, saying that he had failed the entrance exam to a public school.

I saw parents showing off their children's grades online and was even more afraid of being scolded by their parents. Luckily, this person promptly asked for my address and brought me home safely. My family was very touched because my child's "life" was saved.

Recounting this story, the author of the article earnestly requested parents to stop showing off their children's scores on Facebook. "Yesterday, I was also shallow when I sat and waited for my children's scores. I simply wanted to have fun with them. But I forgot about the less fortunate children. I apologize to all of you."

After the post, there was a debate about how parents should react when their children get their test scores. Some people agreed that parents should stop showing off their children online.

But some people object, saying that children passing exams after a hard training process is worth praising and no one has the right to "forbid" parents from expressing pride in their children online.

No matter from which perspective, all opinions agree that the children are still young and have not thought thoroughly. When the exam results are not as expected, they cannot help but feel worried and sad.

So, it is always true that parents should help their children calm down instead of "escalating" negative thoughts.

On the group "Accompanying children during puberty", nick Cao Nga wrote: "Parents, please be more sensitive. Pay attention to your children's emotions during this period. Grade 10 is not the only stage in life. Your child being healthy and happy is the most important. Everything else is just fleeting. Don't put pressure on your child. This story happens every year...".

On July 7, on the group "Reviewing for 10th grade entrance exam...:", an anonymous nick posted a very touching article about the support of parents when they failed the exam: "... I am a student who just passed the 10th grade entrance exam in Hanoi .

Today I am here to share my own story: failing the specialized school entrance exam... I really feel disappointed in myself and feel very guilty towards my parents because I failed all the specialized schools with a miserable score. When I found out the score, I cried a lot.

Not only did my parents not blame me, they also encouraged me. My father was on a business trip at the time but he called me and said, 'It's okay, no matter where you study, your parents will always be by your side...' When I heard what my father said, I couldn't hold back my tears...

I'm here to share with everyone, my friends, my students that failing a specialized exam does not mean losing everything, it's just an experience that helps us gain experience for the next battles in life. I'm also very lucky because I have parents who understand and are by my side...".

With over 20 years of experience in journalism, especially from her experience as a teen journalist, journalist Tran Thu Ha is quite famous online with the nickname Mother Xu Sim. She believes that school exams are just a very, very small part.

When your child fails an exam, parents must first stay calm and encourage them instead of criticizing, scolding, or pressuring them. Help your child believe that if they try hard, they will succeed wherever they study. Consider this a lesson to learn to do better. Failing an exam does not mean that your entire future will be a failure. In particular, help your child understand that no matter what, their parents will always love and accompany them. The ultimate goal is always to create healthy, happy, optimistic children who are not afraid of failure and are always confident.

Dr. Nguyen Thi Thu Anh, member of the National Council forEducation and Human Resources Development, Vice President of the Hanoi Association of Educational Psychology

Out there, every day there are several exams. The exams with yourself are the most difficult and fierce exams. "I read that Ivy League schools and some of the top liberal arts universities in the US are now having to build programs just to support the best students in their schools to overcome early failures.

Because for them, failure is an unfamiliar experience that can paralyze and knock them down!", she shared.

In another article posted on her personal Facebook page after the university entrance exam scores were announced, Ms. Thu Ha expressed: "At this time, thousands of candidates have to face the unpleasant situation that in our country we call "failure", but the UK Ministry of Education simply calls it "delayed success"!

The door of this wish does not open, there may be many other better wishes waiting for you. Just knock on the door and it will open. If the door does not open, who can stop you from knocking many times? If it still does not open, then go knock on another door! The greatest privilege of youth is that life is long, you can still make mistakes and there is always enough time for you to start over."

According to Ms. Ha, parents should teach their children about failure and accepting failure, teaching children that success is not about scores or degrees but about being happy, enjoying life, and doing what they want.

Source: https://phunuvietnam.vn/thi-hong-chi-la-thanh-cong-bi-tri-hoan-20250710132714243.htm


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