Four secrets to writing essays to conquer American universities.

Instead of being long-winded and trying to sound smart on macro topics, candidates who honestly express themselves, tell a unique story, and make an impressive opening will more easily win over the admissions committee.

Sandra Bazzarelli, an essay writing expert and graduate of Columbia University and New York University, shared four highly-rated essay writing tips in a video on February 2nd.

Focus on yourself

Regardless of the story or topic chosen for the essay, Sandra emphasizes that applicants should focus on themselves. The essay is where you show the admissions committee who you are and what your personality is like.

"You are the star of the essay, so highlight who you are through your personal aspects and your unique voice. Don't try to be anyone else because the admissions committee is looking for the special qualities you possess," she said. Therefore, writers shouldn't hesitate to showcase their humor, sensitivity, and unique personality traits and perspectives.

Applicants should avoid trying to appear intelligent or talking about abstract topics with sophisticated vocabulary in an attempt to impress, as this will only make you seem robotic, formulaic, and disconnected from the admissions committee.

Essay writing expert Sandra Bazzarelli shares tips on how to prepare an impressive essay for top US universities. (Screenshot)

Experts say that using overly formal language in essays can sometimes detract from the necessary emotional impact on the reader. According to Sandra, you can use difficult vocabulary learned from test preparation like the SAT (a standardized test commonly used for college admissions in the US), but you shouldn't overuse it. Think of vocabulary like spices used in a dish, intended to enhance the flavor for the diner. Avoid using overly sophisticated language without truly grasping its meaning. It's like adding too much seasoning to a dish.

Tell a unique story and how it relates to yourself.

The essay is an opportunity for applicants to share their story, but it should focus on a specific moment or aspect, rather than being a lengthy narrative.

"The essay is not a memoir, so avoid summarizing stages of your life because it will be difficult for the admissions committee to understand the message you want to convey," Sandra said.

Candidates should pay attention to their relationship with the aspect or topic they want to discuss. For example, how the experience has helped them grow, what value it has given them, and what are their future aspirations and plans based on the lessons learned from this experience?

Having read many essays, Sandra advises that when choosing a topic or story to tell in an essay, applicants should Avoid fabricated stories because the admissions committee will detect them and assess the applicant's honesty.

Make a good impression with your opening hook.

A personal essay is not a structured piece of writing. Grammar is important, but in an essay, admissions officers will value creativity in expressing the applicant's personality, beyond the information provided in the application.

The opening section of an essay is called the hook. It's a way of presenting the story that stimulates interest, making the admissions committee more curious about the message and topic the applicant is aiming for.

Sandra said that the opening sentence can begin with a question, a quote, a statement, a controversial saying, or an action, either directly or indirectly.

For example, the prompt might ask you to talk about someone important or who has had a significant influence on you. A direct opening could be to repeat the question: "The most important person in my life is...". An indirect approach would be to tell a story related to that person. Through your description and storytelling, the admissions committee can get a sense of who you're referring to.

Sandra gave examples of opening sentences that made her wonder, "What's going on?" or "What's next?" such as: "Nobody's listening," "Welcome to New York," "What am I?", "Most people go to church on Sundays to find God, but I go to find sports ..."

She remembers most vividly an essay by a student who loved chemistry, beginning with the sentence: "I made a bomb." This sentence immediately astonished the reader, prompting questions like, "A bomb?". The applicant recounted an opportunity to work as a lifeguard at a swimming pool during an extracurricular activity. The student's task was to check the chlorine levels daily to ensure the water was safe. Once, while checking chemicals, the student accidentally caused an explosion in the pool. Although unharmed, it was a valuable lesson, and the student wanted to help others learn from their mistake. This student was subsequently accepted into Villanova University.

Sandra also liked another essay that began with the question: "Is there any limit to what you do for the people you love?" The applicant wrote about their grandfather, describing his care and love. Additionally, instead of simply calling him "granpa," they referred to him as "my haraboji."

One of Sandra's Vietnamese students also used the word "grandma" instead of "grandma" in her essay to avoid repetition. Incorporating Vietnamese culture and language into the essay contributed to her acceptance into Boston University in 2023.

"Don't just say 'my grandmother' or 'my grandfather,' you can replace it with a term of endearment that's in your culture or language, a way you would address someone you love," Sandra suggested.

Don't be afraid to rewrite it.

Writing an essay is a repetitive process, from drafting, reading aloud, sharing with others, editing, rereading, and rewriting... Sandra compares reading aloud to listening to a song. Reading the lyrics gives you a different experience than listening to the song itself. Reading aloud is important, allowing you to experience something you've never had before when reading in your head.

According to essay writing experts, many students who get accepted into top universities have to rewrite their essays numerous times, even changing topics constantly, just to find the right direction.

Dawn

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