When your child calls you 'honey'

"I was stunned when I saw that moment that night. My daughter's classmate drove her home, then the two of them kissed right in front of the door without seeing me watching them. Then they kissed again. My daughter was only in 8th grade."

Many parents worry when they know their children have crushes in their teens - Illustration: QUANG DINH

Those are Linh's confidences about her teenage daughter.

Frozen when the child steps into love

Ms. Linh shared that after witnessing that, she "reviewed" her daughter's behavior over the past month. T. - Linh's daughter - went to school and then came home and stayed in her room all day, her phone never leaving her hand. Many times, Ms. Linh saw her daughter being sad and happy at different times.

Thinking that her daughter was at a rebellious age, Linh did not interfere too much with her daughter's temperament. But after seeing her daughter being intimate with her classmate's boyfriend, Linh decided to keep an eye on her.

One time, while her daughter was taking a bath, a call came from her boyfriend T., Ms. Linh was even more shocked when she heard her daughter talking on the phone with her boyfriend right in the bathroom, saying sweet words that were too old for her age like "wife is taking a bath, what is my dear husband doing?", "Have you eaten yet?"... That night, Ms. Linh had to discuss with her husband how to handle her daughter's love life.

Mr. Minh, who works from home, said he takes very good care of his son, who is in 10th grade. Mr. Minh said that when he accidentally discovered his son masturbating, he scolded him. When his son entered 10th grade, he learned that he was dating a classmate, so Mr. Minh "threatened" him many times, forbidding him from getting involved in teenage love affairs.

Everything seemed to be going smoothly until one day, Minh received a package for his son. Curious, Minh tore open the package to see what was inside. It was adult-style lingerie that his son had ordered for his girlfriend.

That night he beat his son up badly. Afterwards he went to see his son's friend to talk. The conflict between Minh and his son has been going on ever since.

What to do when you know your child loves you

For parents, the thought of "how far has my child gone in love" is always a troubling question.

According to the Vietnam Family Planning Association, on average each year there are nearly 300,000 abortions nationwide, mainly among 15-19 year olds, of which 60-70% are students.

With such alarming figures, it requires a lot of effort for parents to do something to keep their children on the path of love to protect their health and future.

Linh and her husband decided to talk to their child, the teacher and the child's boyfriend to find a way to "solve" the love affair between the two children. It took a long time and a lot of effort, but no one was sure if everything was okay or not.

Meanwhile, Mr. Minh "jumped" straight into his son's relationship and created a conflict so that his son would end his relationship with his girlfriend, but like Ms. Linh and her husband, Mr. Minh was also not sure whether his son was still in a relationship with his girlfriend or not.

I think the most effective way when seeing children already know how to love is for parents to spend more time with their children, guide their children's love life andeducate them about sex to avoid unfortunate consequences.

This is also the time when parents should act as their children's friends, building mutual trust, to help their children not cross the red line in this teenage relationship.

With your child through the "shaking" age

Master Nguyen Khanh Chi (photo) - training director of GLink Academy Center (HCMC), mother of two daughters, who regularly participates in sharing about love and gender in high schools - shares that when children reach the age of love, parents should not be too shocked.

* When children call you "dear husband"https://tuoitre.vn/"dear wife", what should parents do?

- Children's psychology is influenced by general trends. What the majority of people respond to will be quickly caught up with by you.

Calling each other "husband, wife" has emerged as a popular trend when expressing love between couples and children want to prove their understanding to friends.

Parents should understand the general psychological trends at their children's age, from there, gently discuss and show their children the important meaning of the relationship between husband and wife and this phrase should only be used in appropriate circumstances when they are adults and have families. In addition, parents and children can discuss to find suitable words for budding love at school age.

* When children know love, should we forbid it?

- Instead of strictly prohibiting, parents can consider sharing with their children about "healthy love", which means pure love, age-appropriate love, helping each other to progress and having the responsibility to protect each other to avoid negative consequences on psychology and health. Open conversations will help children boldly exchange, creating opportunities for parents to recognize what their children need from them.

* So, according to you, how should parents share so that their children are safe and parents themselves feel secure?

- What parents need to be concerned about is not to forbid running but to speculate where their young children will run to. If equipped with the right knowledge, skills, and attitudes, children will choose a safe place, but on the contrary, danger is always lurking at every step.

Therefore, in my opinion, parents need to accompany their children on their journey to discover the vast world by guiding them to know which path they should and should not take. Because whether their children have enough provisions or not depends on their perseverance, listening and understanding from their parents' complete love for them.

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Source: https://tuoitre.vn/khi-con-tre-goi-ban-la-chong-yeu-20250316092718128.htm