Ms. Tran Minh Ngoc (37 years old, Kim Lien ward, Hanoi ) still clearly remembers last summer, when she first sent her 8-year-old daughter to a boarding summer camp in the suburbs of Hanoi.
At that time, she had just changed jobs, her husband was on a long business trip, and her child was not comfortable staying home alone during the summer vacation. After much deliberation, she decided to register her child for a 7-day summer camp program, which was introduced with attractive content such as learning survival skills, training discipline, and independence.
"Before the trip, my child was not very excited, I had to encourage and coax him a lot. Along with that, thanks to the consultants reassuring me that most children going for the first time are like that, it only takes a few days to get used to it, so I was somewhat less worried," Ms. Mai recalled.
During her child’s participation, the organizers regularly updated the activities. Seeing pictures of her daughter laughing and playing with her friends, and even a review saying “she really enjoyed the summer camp, learned a lot and hopes to come back next year”, the female parent felt completely reassured. However, when she picked her child up, she soon realized that things were not as shown in the pictures.
Since the incident at the Eager Village summer camp, parents are cautious when sending their children to summer camps. (Illustration: Eager Village)
"The first night I came home, I hugged my mother and cried. I told her that every night I missed home so much that I had to hide under the blanket and cry, not wanting to take a shower because the bathroom was so dirty. One day I fell and scratched my leg, I raised my hand to ask for a band-aid but no one paid attention," Mai said.
The female parent said that forcing children to express positive emotions when they are tired, scared or unhappy is unacceptable. “That is not a lesson in life skills, but a way to teach children to lie about their feelings to please adults,” said Ms. Mai.
After the incident, Ms. Mai did not report anything to the organizers because she thought that everything was over, her child was home safely, and making a big deal out of it would not solve anything. However, the female parent firmly said no to boarding summer camp programs.
In a similar situation, Ms. Le Tu Anh (40 years old, Ba Dinh ward, Hanoi) also sent her 10-year-old son to a week-long boarding summer camp. At that time, she chose it because she believed that a dynamic environment with many outdoor activities would help her son become bolder and less dependent on electronic devices.
"Before the end of the summer camp, I saw many comments from the children posted on the organizer's fanpage. Every post praised the delicious food, enthusiastic teachers, friendly friends, everyone seemed excited and happy to come back. I read it and felt relieved, thinking I had chosen the right environment for my child to experience the summer," said Ms. Tu Anh.
However, a few days later, when talking to her son more closely, she began to feel uneasy. Her son said that his group mates had teased him, and that one day, despite the scorching sun, he still had to participate in outdoor activities the entire day. One time, his clothes got wet but he was not changed immediately, which made him feel uncomfortable. Some lunches had cold food and missing dishes, but when he complained to the volunteer teachers, he was ignored or considered "difficult".
Her son also said that before the camp ended, all students were required to write a reflection essay, but the content had to be positive. Teachers suggested phrases such as “very happy”, “memorable”, “learned a lot”. Those who did not follow the requirements were reminded and forced to write until they met the requirements.
"My child said that at first he didn't know what to write because he didn't really like it, but because he was afraid of the teacher, he copied the work of the friend next to him, as long as he finished it so he could go home," said Ms. Tu Anh. Since then, the female parent has become reserved whenever someone mentions summer camp programs.
According to her, sending children to the countryside to play in the dirt is safer than letting them participate in a place where the appearance is overly embellished, while the children's true feelings are ignored.
Warning about psychological risks for children when going to unsafe summer camps. (Illustration: Eager Village)
Ms. Nguyen Thi Thanh Diep, a preschool teacher in Hanoi, said that the fact that children are asked to write about their feelings as "happy, interesting, wonderful" while their actual experience is the opposite is a very worrying form of psychological pressure.
“Adults may simply think it is a short essay to summarize activities and please parents, but for children, it is a distorted lesson on how to express emotions: not allowed to be sad, not allowed to be bored, and especially not allowed to tell the truth if it does not match adults' expectations,” said the female teacher.
According to Ms. Diep, forcing children to write things that are not true sometimes not only temporarily hurts their feelings, but also sows the seeds of concealment and reluctance to express, gradually causing children to lose touch with their true feelings. Children need to be encouraged to speak the truth, to feel the truth, even if it is boredom, disappointment or discomfort.
“When children are forced to speak against their inner feelings, they will gradually lose confidence in their true feelings, leading to a breakdown in their inner connection. In the long run, this affects their ability to communicate, behave, and even their mental health,” the teacher said, emphasizing that a truly valuable program for children is one where they can live true to their own feelings, share both positive and negative things, and be listened to seriously by adults.
Source: https://vtcnews.vn/trai-he-am-anh-nhung-tre-bi-ep-ghi-cam-nhan-tuyet-voi-ar954316.html
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