Single mothers - 'warriors' in everyday life

In modern society, more and more women choose to go alone on the path of raising their children. Not because they do not want a full home, but because circumstances force them to leave what should be warm and cozy. Behind the two words "single mother" is a silent journey: economic burden, fighting prejudice, building love with all the courage of a mother who is never allowed to be weak.

Single mothers are like warriors without armor in everyday life. (Illustration image created by AI).

Many "storms"

Every single mother I meet and know is a story, a slice of life filled with many worries. Ms. Ha Thi Lan, in Tuc Duyen ward ( Thai Nguyen city) is my aerobics classmate. Eleven years ago, she left her marriage after a series of days of betrayal and abuse by her husband. At that time, her daughter was just five years old. Her monthly salary as a worker of 7 million VND was not enough for her to cover living expenses and hospital fees for her often sick child.

“There was a month when I only had 200,000 VND left in my wallet and my child wanted to buy a beautiful dress in the supermarket. I had to turn away and wipe my tears.” - Ms. Lan said.

Ms. Le Thuy Duong, 41 years old, in Thang Loi ward (Song Cong city), has also been a single mother for 7 years. Her husband passed away after a serious illness, leaving behind a young daughter. With a civil servant income of 5-6 million VND/month, she had to open a drink shop in the evening to make ends meet.

In single mother groups on social networks, I have come across many stories of single mothers. Many are lucky to have their biological parents support them, but many have to take care of the financial burden on their own. Some choose to live a private life, not wanting anyone to know that their child does not have a father, for fear of hurting their child.

Not only do single mothers have to bear the financial burden, they also have to endure a lot of mental pressure and nameless sadness. Ms. Le Thuy Duong confided: Sometimes, I feel sad and sorry for my daughter who has had to live without her father's affection since she was little.

As for Ms. Nguyen Thi Huyen (Phu Binh), she has been a single mother for more than 13 years. She is a teacher, and also thought a lot before deciding to give birth alone, without a wedding, without a man by her side. Ms. Huyen said, when she was young, she once took her child to the hospital, the doctor asked "Where is your father?". A very normal question, but it made her choke up. Or at class reunions, when her friends were all married, with children, she sat quietly in a corner. "It's not that I'm jealous, it's just that I feel... so different." Not to mention, at first, she was a teacher, so many people gossiped about her situation of not getting married but giving birth.

Talking about raising her child alone, Ms. Ha Thi Lan could not hide her emotions: When my child was young, he did not know, so he kept asking where his father was and why he was not with us. I could only mumble and answer that he was on a business trip far away. My child kept asking, why did his father not come back to visit us? I had to change the subject.

Single mothers are like warriors without armor in everyday life (Illustration image created by AI).

Face it strong

No one chooses to be a single mother to be praised as strong. But when circumstances force them to choose, they walk that path with love and extraordinary determination.

Hoang Mai Hoa, from Hoa Thuong town (Dong Hy), accidentally got pregnant when she was a freshman. Having got married in a hurry and broken up after less than a year, Hoa struggled to both study and raise her child. After graduating, unable to find a job in her field, she worked as a factory worker and an office worker to have more time to make up for her child. When asked about getting married again, Hoa just shook her head: "I think my children and I will live like this for freedom. I'm very afraid of marriage."

Back to the story of Ms. Huyen that I shared above, her choice not to get married but still give birth and raise her child alone caused a stir in the countryside where she lived and her family members objected. But she was steadfast. For the past 13 years, she has been teaching and taking care of her son alone. Now, the boy is in 8th grade, studies well, is obedient, and is always her pride.

“Now everyone understands, sympathizes, loves and shares more with mother and child. Even though life is difficult and hard, having a child gives me more strength to overcome it.” - Ms. Huyen shared.

Unlike Ms. Huyen, Ms. Hoang Thi Hue , in Trung Vuong ward (Thai Nguyen city) decided to divorce while pregnant with her first child. Her husband was abusive, had affairs, drank alcohol regularly, came home to curse and beat his wife, even when she was pregnant. So instead of waiting until she gave birth, Ms. Hue chose to leave while pregnant. After 6 years, she opened a snack shop. Being skillful and diligent, she built a stable customer base and had a stable income to raise her child. From a small rented house, she built a level 4 house. Although her small family did not have enough adults, it was full of love.

Another woman I met, Ms. Nguyen Thi Hoa, in Dong Dat commune (Phu Luong), had a traffic accident that left her paralyzed for two years before she died. She still works as a factory worker during the day, and at night she takes advantage of the opportunity to livestream and sell products online. Her two sons are still growing up normally and studying well. She confided: “The economy is a bit more difficult, because I take care of all the expenses by myself. But my children and I have more time together. Sometimes we are even happier than women who have husbands but live in violence or dependence.”

Respect the differences

Meeting single mothers, I appreciate them even more, because they dare to do the most difficult thing: Step out of their comfort zone, face prejudices and raise their children with all their love. “I don’t need anyone’s praise, nor do I expect sympathy, I just want to live as a normal mother raising children, like everyone else,” Ms. Hoang Thi Hue confided.

Although it has not become a trend yet, we see many women choosing to raise their children alone. Joy, sadness, hardship, happiness, all the emotions that single women have to accept. They do not wear armor, do not have a husband by their side, but they are still steadfast warriors. Every day that passes, they overcome fatigue, overcome loneliness to give their children the fullest childhood possible.

Source: https://baothainguyen.vn/xa-hoi/202506/me-don-than-nhung-chien-binhgiua-doi-thuong-ffa1127/