8 mistakes parents make that cause their children to have an unhappy childhood

GĐXH - Parents making these mistakes will leave darkness in the children's souls, seriously affecting their future perception.

1. "Programming" your child's life

Some parents, perhaps unintentionally, impose their childhood fears, dreams, and ambitions on their children.

This makes it difficult for children to grow as separate individuals. Therefore, parents need to focus on discovering their children's passions and talents to create conditions for them to develop instead of raising them like they are raising a younger version of themselves.

Some parents may unintentionally impose their childhood fears, dreams, and ambitions on their children. Illustration photo

2. Arguing in front of children

In life, couples cannot avoid conflicts, but if they raise their voices or even fight in front of their children, the children will feel the unhappy atmosphere and will also cause a lot of psychological pressure.

If this pressure accumulates over time, it will cause children to become withdrawn, apathetic, insecure and unable to communicate happily with their peers.

Therefore, parents should try to maintain a happy atmosphere in the family. If possible, you should not only avoid arguing in front of your children but also live peacefully so that children can feel the most sincere harmony in the family.

3. Imitation

Many people raise their children the way their parents did, using the same phrases and repeating negative things they experienced as children.

However, Dr. Lisa Firestone, Director of the Glendon Association Research andEducation Center, believes that just because parents learn from their parents does not mean they should apply that parenting style to their children, especially with the "spare the rod and spoil the child" perspective.

4. Spanking and scolding to discipline children

You might say: "Children are naughty and like to cause trouble. How can we do that without beating and scolding them?"

The easiest way to educate is to beat and scold, this creates a submissive personality, that is, on the surface they are afraid and obedient but deep down they want to do things that their parents forbid.

Second, children will feel despised, easily imitate, get angry with others and affect harmony with peers.

Parents should try to control their emotions. First, use a slightly serious tone to stop children from doing wrong things and guide them on what to do.

Education can only be truly effective if both parties are not influenced by any emotions.

Education can only be truly effective if both parties are not affected by any emotions. Illustration photo

5. Overloading your child with studies

Caught up in the hustle and bustle of modern life, many parents do not want their children to fall behind, so they have created a tight schedule. In the morning, children go to music lessons, in the afternoon they learn to draw, in the evening they do homework, on the weekend they learn sports , etc.

Children have to compete with other children to achieve high scores or achievements as expected by their parents. This leads to overload and causes invisible pressure on children, they do not have enough time to play and explore the life around them.

Scientific studies agree that letting children play freely stimulates their imagination, creativity and thinking ability.

Overloading children with extracurricular or curricular activities can lead to harmful results such as mental stress, loss of appetite, or even suicide.

The American Academy of Pediatrics explains: "Play is essential to natural development because it contributes to the cognitive, physical, and emotional growth of children and adolescents."

6. Breaking promises to children

Parents sometimes tell their children, "After you eat, you can watch TV"; "After you finish your homework, I'll let you go out to play." However, when the child actually finishes eating and finishing his homework, the parents give him other things, as if the original promises were never made.

If children make empty promises many times, they will feel that adults are not trustworthy. Not only will they no longer easily trust their parents, but they will also take advantage of this attitude to get along with others, causing an irresponsible personality.

Next time before you make a promise to your child, think carefully whether the promise is possible to keep.

When your child does what they should do, let them actually feel "rewarded". That also creates a good image in their mind.

7. Let your child get involved in adult problems

Never let your children pick up on your bad habits or negative issues. Imagine how embarrassed your child will be in front of their friends if their parents are addicted to drugs or gambling and in debt.

In addition, a fairly common case where parents are unintentionally harming their children is during the divorce process, one of the two tries to manipulate the child against the other, which deeply hurts the child's feelings. Therefore, if you are divorced, try not to speak ill of your ex in front of your children.

Never let your children be infected with bad habits or negative problems of their parents. Illustration photo

8. Lack of patience with children's questions

Curiosity is the nature of every child, children always want to know everything they discover in this big world and often ask "Why" that parents cannot answer or use perfunctory answers.

An indecisive attitude or saying "Don't ask anymore questions" will make children lose their curiosity and desire to learn about new things, and over time they will also lose their enthusiasm for solving problems.

Parents can also be good teachers for their children and clear up any doubts they may have! If your child asks a difficult question when you are busy, patiently tell them, "I don't know about this question.

I will tell you after we check the information together." Checking information together makes children think that "asking questions and solving problems is fun", which is very helpful for their thinking ability.

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/8-sai-lam-cua-cha-me-khien-con-trai-qua-mot-tuoi-tho-khong-may-vui-ve-172241031152807648.htm