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Teach your children to keep their word.

Báo Dân SinhBáo Dân Sinh30/11/2023


Children always tend to imitate what their parents do. To teach children trustworthiness, the first thing parents must do is uphold trustworthiness themselves.

When parents are the ones who break their promises.

Sharing her feelings on the television program "What I Want to Say," Gia Hân expressed her frustration: "My mom always makes promises but breaks them. She promised to take me out for hot pot that afternoon, but then it depended on her mood; if she was angry, she wouldn't go."

The little girl thought her mother wasn't busy, it was just that she was "short-tempered." Gia Han frankly said, "If we do something even slightly wrong, Mom gets very annoyed. Every time she promises something, she adds, 'It depends on my mood.' That makes me uncomfortable and I no longer believe in her promises."

Ms. Thu Hong, Gia Han's mother, explained that her husband works in media and is constantly away on business, sometimes for a week or even a month. She has to take care of her in-laws and two children all by herself.

Every day, she struggles with housework, cooking, and her two children's education. Often, seeing her children unable to go out and play, she feels sorry for them and promises to take them to the supermarket, for bubble tea, or hot pot, but then something happens that day that upsets her, and she loses interest.

The reasons she often breaks promises to her children are usually her busy work schedule, her children neglecting their studies, and being addicted to video games... Thu Hong admits that breaking promises to her children has happened repeatedly. She herself cannot control her emotions and feelings.

The story of Thu Hong and little Gia Han sounds very familiar, as if there's a reflection of ourselves in it.

Most parents have broken promises to their children at least a few times, perhaps even hundreds of times. We always have reasons to justify this behavior: sometimes we're busy, sometimes we're tired, sometimes we're in a bad mood, or sometimes we're broke, it's raining, or we're stuck in traffic...

It's a pity for the children; they always idolize their parents and think that everything their parents say will definitely be done. The first time their parents betray them, children will feel extremely disappointed. But if they are repeatedly betrayed, they will gradually lose faith and no longer believe anything you say. And once they can't even trust their own parents, how can they trust anyone else in society?

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How can I keep my word to my children?

Don't make promises to your child if you're not sure you can keep them. If you have already made a promise, try to arrange your time and work schedule to fulfill it. In impossible situations, honestly share with your child the reason why you can't fulfill the promise at this time and commit to keeping it at a more suitable time. Apologize to your child when you can't keep your promise instead of blaming the circumstances or blaming the child. Blaming your child for your inability to keep a promise will only make them more disappointed in you.

If adults

If adults "keep their word," it also means they are teaching their children a lesson: to be responsible for their words. (Illustrative image)

According to psychologist Dr. Bui Hong Quan: "In family education, keeping promises is also a lesson for children. If adults 'say what they mean and do what they say,' it also means they are giving their children a lesson: being responsible for their words."

According to psychologist Dr. Bui Hong Quan, parents need to separate things from emotions. Negative emotions from the outside should not be brought into the home so as not to affect how they communicate with their children. "Managing emotions is a long process, but with persistent practice, it can be achieved. In addition, keeping commitments is very important; it will bring positive results in all relationships, especially family relationships," the doctor affirmed.

To teach children to keep their word in life, the first thing parents must do is set a good example. Parents should strive to keep their promises to their children to avoid disappointment and prevent children from imitating the actions of adults.

Psychologists say that keeping one's word is one of the foundations for building a good character in a child. Children will become more honest, and their relationships with family and friends will become more trusting and close. This will also make them more responsible and confident in their development. To teach children to keep their word, parents should avoid joking, lying, or making promises just for fun.

When parents see their children breaking promises, they must promptly educate and correct them, explaining the importance of telling the truth and keeping their word to others.

Tell your children parables about keeping their word so they can learn valuable lessons. Explain the benefits of keeping their word: They will be respected, trusted, and loved by others. They will find it easier to cooperate and work with people. Conversely, if they don't keep their word, they will not be respected, no one will want to work with them, no one will believe what they say, and they may even be isolated and disliked.

If you want to be a kind person, one of the things you need to learn is to keep your word.

PEACEFUL



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