Have to take care of the children, when the daughter-in-law comes home she goes straight to the bedroom.

The mother cried as she shared her and her husband's story.

For many parents, their lifelong effort is to give their children the most stable life. Therefore, they are willing to sell all their land and houses in the countryside to buy a house for their children in the city. However, not all children are affectionate, filial, and know how to repay that sacrifice, leaving their parents hurt and miserable.

That is the story of a mother who came to share with expert, Doctor of Psychology Dinh Doan on the talk show Confide in Dinh Doan posted on the YouTube channel Life Lessons.

Accordingly, she is from the North, married to Thanh Hoa . The couple has 3 children including 2 daughters and 1 youngest son. The family life is normal, not rich but enough to feed and clothe the children to adulthood.

The mother came to share with the talk show (Screenshot)

The two older daughters got married and both lived near their parents' house, while the youngest son went to Hanoi to study at university and then stayed to work. In 2020, the guy got married and the young couple had to rent a house because they didn't have enough money to buy one.

During the pandemic, the son returned to his hometown and complained about the difficult life, the rented house was far from his workplace. He even said that because of the tight economy and having to rent a house, the couple did not dare to have children. So he wanted his parents to sell all the land and house in Thanh Hoa, combine it with some money from his wife's family to buy a house in Hanoi. Then he and his wife would welcome his parents to live with them so they could take care of them.

Hearing her daughter speak, the mother was both happy and worried because her daughter knew how to think of her, especially about filial piety. After that, she told her daughter about her intention, but both of them objected, absolutely not agreeing to let her parents sell the house. However, the couple did not listen, still sold all the house, land, and garden and gave all the money to their son.

After moving to the city to live with their son and daughter-in-law, the old couple realized many problems.

First is the difference in lifestyle. Because the children are young, many things do not agree with their parents. If the father-in-law gives advice but the children do not listen, they become hot-tempered and have high blood pressure.

Next, the daughter-in-law gave birth to a grandchild and went back to work after her maternity leave ended. Her parents-in-law didn't know what she did, but she went from early morning to late at night, leaving the grandchild and all the housework to her grandparents to take care of.

“We had to cook and take care of everything for the child. By the time the daughter-in-law came home, the child was already asleep. After the daughter-in-law finished eating and bathing, she would go straight to her own room. My husband did not agree with that at all. Actually, we did not mind taking care of the child, but the more we lived with our son and daughter-in-law, the more conflicts we had,” the mother said.

In the end, the husband's parents decided to eat and live separately. However, the limited space in the apartment did not solve the problem. There was a time when the daughter-in-law had a "cold war" with her husband's parents, going back and forth for a whole month without greeting anyone.

Finally, the husband's parents still had difficulty adjusting to the strange life in the city, without friends, not knowing who to share with. Therefore, they felt miserable, sad, could not sleep at night and cried all night. Currently, when their daughter called to ask, they did not dare to tell the truth because they had not listened to her advice before, wanted to go back to the countryside but had no place to go.

After telling her story, the mother burst into tears on air.

Expert Dinh Doan

For his part, expert Dinh Doan affirmed that this is not rare and he always reminds parents to think for themselves and take care of themselves first because: "Children are not savings, children are not priceless assets" . The expert also believes that if the land is large, parents can sell a part to support their children but definitely not sell the house. And the land and property of parents when left to their children should be divided among their two daughters as well, but the parents in the story did not do so.

With the current situation, expert Dinh Doan advises parents-in-law to learn to be a little calmer and more proactive, such as suggesting that the child go to school and not babysit anymore. When they have time, they should spend time exercising, going for walks, etc., and taking the opportunity to go back to the countryside to play with their grandchildren.

Along with that, parents should speak directly to their sons to remind their wives how to behave. If the daughter-in-law is too much, they can ask a prestigious person in the family to discuss with the children or, in the end, threaten the children that they will leave. However, experts emphasize that the parents-in-law have not left any way back for them, so all measures are only to reduce the frustration and do not completely solve the problem.

SA

Source: Life Lessons

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/nguoi-phu-nu-len-ban-dat-o-que-mua-chung-cu-ha-noi-cho-con-trai-hien-tai-cay-dang-phai-lo-het-cho-chau-con-dau-ve-la-chui-vao-phong-ngu-172250125081300492.htm