Psychologists talk about the "curtain-pulling" action in the case of the teacher being knocked down

(Dan Tri) - According to a female psychology doctor, the student's action of "pulling the curtain" when the teacher was assaulted means "shame".

Looking with outside eyes, it will seem so insensitive!

“The 7th grade students involved in the assault on their teacher were not insensitive,” said psychologist Dr. Dang Hoang Ngan, an independent psychologist, after watching the video of the incident that has been making headlines in recent days.

Ms. Ngan explained that through the clip, she saw the shocked reactions and self-neglectful behavior of some children in the face of an event that was too psychologically unbearable.

One child initially recoiled and held his hands over his mouth for a long time. The other child stood still and tended to turn his face to the wall for a period of time. The paralysis was a clear manifestation of the shock reaction.

Psychologist Dang Hoang Ngan (Photo: NVCC).

Regarding the student’s curtain-drawing action, the female doctor expressed her opinion: “When the curtain is drawn, shame arises. Maybe the students do not know or only know how to repeat what adults see when dealing with shame: Cover it up, instead of looking deeply into it to find ways to help and improve.”

According to Ms. Ngan, using the word “insensitive” in this situation is a simplification of the complex experiences of the children. Here, they are not only disconnected or helpless in the face of an unexpected situation, but also lack of problem-solving role models from adults (in many other exemplary social situations) as well as lack of belief in what is right and humane.

She believes that the children are not emotionless but are suffering from a deadlock with their own emotions and do not yet have the ability to describe their emotions.

This person recalled a shocking incident that she herself witnessed when she was 16 years old. On a bus, the driver stopped the bus and jumped out to slap two high school girls because he thought the group was too noisy - one of the two girls was a close friend of hers.

There were many students and some working people on that bus, but everyone's reaction at that time was silence.

Mrs. Ngan was the first to show her anger, pouring out words and looks that were considered rude to adults. She understood that her actions stemmed from her special emotional connection with the victim, otherwise she would have been paralyzed, thinking only rationally about what to do to be safe, to resolve the situation appropriately and missed the most necessary moment to act.

“It was only much later that I realized that what we think we can do when we observe through the screen or hear about it is very different from what we actually do when the situation happens,” Ms. Dang Hoang Ngan shared.

Therefore, with the incident of students assaulting a teacher that just happened, not only the two main characters need psychological care.

Teachers need to be respected for their vulnerability.

For the teacher in this heartbreaking incident, Dr. Dang Hoang Ngan hopes that she will not be pressured by the moral pressure of a teacher and the words of praise for her humanity that the school has given her, to urge forgiveness.

She may have to choose to prioritize the standards expected of a teacher over the natural needs of someone who has experienced injustice. But she hopes teachers won’t force themselves to forgive or be magnanimous in the face of their own emotions.

The clip recorded the incident of a male student grabbing the teacher's hair and knocking her down in the middle of the classroom in front of many students (Photo taken from the clip).

The teacher needs to be respected for her emotional vulnerability and gradually make sense of the vague feelings she is experiencing such as self-doubt about her position as a teacher, self-blame for not receiving protection, feeling lonely among children...

For students with misbehavior, she hopes they will be accompanied in a process to gradually resolve their internal conflicts and truly look back on the past experience.

Education is to help wrongdoers take responsibility for their actions, at a level appropriate to their understanding and perception.

Dr. Ngan also hopes that the students who witnessed it will not be forgotten, and will receive psychological care, including those who really do not feel anything, and even find it entertaining...

When adults ask their children questions like: “Why didn’t you intervene when you saw that?”, “Should we call an adult?”, “Why did you pull the curtain?”, according to Ms. Ngan, we really ask to understand and listen enough so that the children can gradually open up.

At that time, your children might say: "Because that friend is big and holds a sharp object, I'm scared", "Because I like that friend", "Because I think children need to be protected, while teachers are adults", "Because I'm afraid of losing points in the class competition", "Because I want my friends to see me as a cool person, not affected by big things", "I don't know, I couldn't think of anything at that time"...

This psychologist also hopes that schools and families do not think that the matter can be resolved only through a few administrative efforts with the parties. Attention and companionship with each new experience is the foundation for education to fulfill its mission.

Source: https://dantri.com.vn/giao-duc/tien-si-tam-ly-noi-ve-dong-tac-keo-rem-trong-vu-co-giao-bi-quat-nga-20250921163617760.htm