Don't give money to your parents!

Online, someone asked the question: Should adults give money to their parents after they start working?

Filial piety towards parents is natural. But how much money should you give, how should you give it, and when should you give it so that you feel happy, your parents are touched by the amount you receive, and the whole family is joyful?

01

For middle-income families, it's not advisable to give money to parents.

Your financial situation is average. Your parents don't have a pension, don't have stable jobs, and make a living through odd jobs. However, they are still young and healthy. For a family like this, it's not advisable to give them money monthly; it's best to give it every six months or once a year.

Giving your parents 1-2 million VND per month won't actually make them rich. It will also make them feel like they have a fixed monthly income, which can lead to laziness, procrastination, lack of initiative, even quitting their jobs, and a lack of ambition, simply enjoying their comfortable life.

The key point is that the parents are still young and far from retirement age. If they don't save for their retirement, they will develop a mindset of relying on their children for financial support. This not only makes the family's finances more difficult but also negatively impacts their children.

If you only give 1-2 million VND a month, your parents might feel that amount is too little! But if you save 1-2 million VND each month and give them 12-24 million VND at the end of the year, your parents will feel that you give them a lot, that earning money isn't easy, but you always set aside some money for them.

It not only shows your filial piety but also makes your parents feel that their child is promising. It also motivates parents to work harder during normal times. Therefore, normally, limit giving money to your parents. That small amount is just a drop in the pond and cannot solve any real problems.

02

You shouldn't give your salary card to your parents.

If you are the eldest child in the family and the only one working, while your siblings are still in school, then don't give your parents too much money.

I've seen many young people, especially girls, give their paychecks to their parents, thinking their mothers can save money for them because they can't. Then, when they turn 30, get married, and ask their parents about the money, they only get the same answer: "That's family money; we need to save it to buy a house for my younger brother."

Your money becomes your family's money. Everyone in the family can use the money except you.

Initially, giving money to parents was done with trust and joy, and using it to buy things for the family wasn't a problem. But if your parents don't acknowledge it as your money, they might take all the money you've earned after nearly 10 years of hard work and give it to your siblings. Such cases are not uncommon.

Don't let money become the cause of strained relationships between family members. Keep both your salary card and your money. During holidays, just buy household items, give money to your parents, and buy gifts for your parents and siblings—that's enough.

So, if there are many siblings in the family who work, and some are married, how should this be handled? Then, it's best to sit down and discuss it together. Usually, the eldest sibling will be the first to speak up, and if the other family members follow suit, then that's how it should be done.

03

Humble, not boastful, and filial to the best of one's ability.

Even with parents, wealth shouldn't be explained too explicitly. If you have a lot of money and let your parents know, no matter how much you give them, they will still consider it insufficient. If you measure everything in terms of money, sooner or later your family relationships will deteriorate.

Don't give your parents money too often; if you give them too much and too frequently, it will become a given. If one day they suddenly stop receiving money, you'll face complaints.

For parents, when they face urgent difficulties, giving them money is necessary, and showing filial piety during holidays is also a good thing to do. If you can still afford it, give your parents an additional sum at the end of the year.

Don't give money reluctantly just to satisfy your family's vanity. If you can afford it, give more; otherwise, you can stop.

Act within your means, secure your own livelihood first, then be filial to your parents; in this way, both the giver and the receiver will be happy.

Don't treat "regularly giving money to your parents" as an overly rigid goal. Because any dissatisfaction and tension over time will be amplified, turning a good thing into a bad one, contrary to the original meaning of filial piety.

Dieu Dan

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/mot-su-that-le-ra-toi-nen-biet-som-nhung-toi-tan-tuoi-30-moi-tham-thia-dung-dua-tien-cho-bo-me-172240523155632223.htm