Things I don't remember

Việt Nam•17/03/2024

In a person's life, countless events unfold, countless encounters with different people and situations in various environments, contexts, and circumstances. Frequent encounters don't necessarily mean deep connections. Fleeting moments can sometimes leave behind lingering doubts, anxieties, and lingering regrets.

(Illustrative image).

When I worked at my old agency, he was a colleague who occasionally wrote feature articles, reports, and sometimes even politically charged pieces. As the "gatekeeper," I was fortunate enough to read, evaluate, edit, and submit his works for publication. These weren't just stories about remote, mountainous areas rarely visited by reporters, thus receiving preferential treatment. Nor were they articles that could be published or not published without consequence. His writings were meticulously crafted, from identifying the topic and gathering information to expressing, arguing, and interpreting the content. Even the language and tone were deeply imbued with affection for the mountainous regions and the struggling people where he lived. There was absolutely no comparison, self-pity, or despair; instead, it was humane, optimistic, and bright.

It had been almost 20 years since we last met. He had retired more than a decade ago. He rode his motorbike to where we were staying, only about 5 kilometers away, but his hands were "a little shaky, because since retiring he's only used to riding a bicycle, like for exercise." Touring the historical sites in the province, he recalled many stories. He remembered our field trip together nearly 20 years ago, the few times we went to Hanoi , and even the times we "skipped" Hanoi because "the bus company didn't go that way, so we always made a detour to the capital instead of going home." He remembered many things, recounting stories about editing articles, published works, awards, and even how I picked him up, dropped him off, and we went out for drinks. Of course, there were things I remembered, even very clearly, without forgetting a single detail. But there were things, frankly, I didn't remember at all, especially those related to work.

And in my work, it's not just with you; I've also been "forgetful" like that with quite a few colleagues, especially collaborators. Many people have reminded me of similar published works. The things I forget in my nearly 30 years of working in this profession, across three different media outlets, are probably countless. The number of things I forget in a career spent traveling to different places is immeasurable. But not remembering doesn't mean I'm indifferent, heartless, or apathetic. It's simply because it's my job. It's my duty. It's purely my work.

Of course, the same applies to life and other jobs. For example, when teaching, even though it was a "side job," I taught many classes and courses over many years. Naturally, I would remember the classes with particularly memorable students, but I probably didn't have enough time, attention, conversations, or exchanges to remember the rest. I only know that when I mention the class name, school name, or course, it will certainly evoke some general memories, special individuals, rare events, or memorable experiences. Therefore, I've met many people who had listened to my lectures and professional discussions, and they've said that they remember the lessons and stories I told very well. Some even said that those subjects or classes were inspiring, turning points that changed their way of thinking and their work later on...

In a person's life, countless events unfold, countless encounters with different people and situations in various environments and contexts. Frequent occurrences don't necessarily mean lasting impressions. Fleeting moments can sometimes leave behind lingering doubts, anxieties, and lingering regrets. Life is like that. Work and relationships are the same. Things we forget aren't necessarily meaningless or wasted. We only hope that those things we don't remember don't hurt or harm anyone, even though that's not easy...

Nguyen Tri Thuc

Source