Is it necessary to give money as a gift?

On July 20th, a man in Henan , China, posted a video of his nephew's wedding, attracting significant attention online. He explained that it was his nephew's wedding day, with guests already present and the hotel ready for the reception. However, the wedding was unexpectedly canceled at the last minute.

The reason was that the bride demanded an additional 50,000 RMB (approximately 174 million VND) as a fee for transporting the bride to the wedding car, but the groom considered this request unreasonable and refused to pay. Neither side would compromise, and the groom became so angry that he decided to cancel the wedding.

Previously, the groom's family had given the bride 188,000 RMB (over 655 million VND). After a disagreement arose, the two sides negotiated, and the bride's family returned 180,000 RMB (approximately 627 million VND).

However, since all the relatives and guests were present, the party proceeded as normal. The only difference was that the wedding was canceled, so the wedding ceremonies were not held; everyone ate and then dispersed on their own.

Guests were sitting and standing haphazardly after the wedding was canceled.

According to the person who posted the clip, marriage is not a business. Before the wedding, both sides agreed on the amount of money and wedding gifts, but demanding more money right after getting married is inappropriate.

The groom's family wasn't very well-off, and they used up all their savings on dowry, wedding gold, gifts, etc., for the bride. The uncle also argued that 50,000 RMB is not a small amount, and an average family would find it difficult to raise that much immediately. While acknowledging that the bride's family might have a custom of giving money as a dowry, he suggested that if they truly cared for the groom, a symbolic amount of a few hundred RMB (approximately 700,000 VND) would suffice, rather than going for tens of thousands.

After much discussion, the whole family was saddened by the cancellation of their nephew's wedding, but also considered it a timely decision. The uncle acknowledged that this would invite ridicule from relatives and friends, but still believed that many would understand the groom's decision.

“When the wedding was canceled, the bride's family even said that our family was stingy, that we had spent so much money before, so why should we be so calculating about this small amount? Actually, it wasn't just the dowry that was returned, but also the groom's family's self-respect. We respect the bride's family, but we also have our own self-respect; we can't let others trample on our self-respect just because we want to get married,” said the groom's uncle.

(Illustrative image)

Regarding this incident, netizens have left many conflicting opinions. Some argue that each place has its own customs, and giving money as a dowry is normal; if it's a custom, it should be followed, and posting a video to explain it doesn't necessarily mean it's right. Others assert that a wedding is about two people building their happiness together, so why should they have to provide money for this or that?

However, the most frequently asked question is about the guests' wedding gifts. Since the wedding continues even without the bride and groom, should guests still send wedding gifts? Or should they not need to give gifts at the groom's next wedding? While it's true that weddings are canceled, the issue of guest gifts also needs clarification.

What do you think about this situation?

SA

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/vu-co-dau-chu-re-dot-ngot-huy-le-cuoi-khi-toan-bo-khach-moi-da-co-mat-van-an-tiec-can-mung-tien-hay-khong-172240729123125114.htm