My family lives in the suburbs, less than 20 km from Hanoi . I have a small shop in the inner city, usually going to work in the morning and returning to my hometown in the evening. My two children, from childhood to adulthood, have both studied at the village school. In secondary school, my eldest son studied well, determined to pass the exam with high scores and was admitted to a top school in Hanoi.
Seeing that our children were eager to study, my husband and I decided to move to the capital, stay at the store, rent a small room nearby, so that both children could study conveniently, and return to the countryside on weekends. In general, life in the city has many hardships, but the whole family has gradually adapted and overcome them. However, I still cannot understand and adapt to the matter of paying for classes and schools here.
Last Sunday, after the parent-teacher conference for my child, I was shocked for the second time. The first time was after the meeting at the beginning of the school year, when the parent committee announced that each child would pay 1.3 million VND for class fund per semester, plus 150 thousand VND for school fund. I intended to stand up and ask: "Why do you collect so much money, sir?" but seeing the teacher still sitting there, and other parents raising their hands in agreement, I stopped.
Compared to his friends, my child has suffered many disadvantages because his parents are manual workers, his family in the countryside is not well off… I don’t want him to be noticed more or to be branded as a “gossip” or “stingy” father if I speak up about money. I really don’t dare ask anyone about this question.
At the last semester 1 summary meeting, I thought I would see the parents' committee clearly disclose the income and expenditure and was sure that the budget would have a surplus. But no! The income and expenditure sheet given to each person was only a few lines long, with general notes: Flower purchase expenses on October 20: 6,000,000; Flower purchase expenses on November 20: 7,500,000; Flower purchase expenses for the first semester, envelope: 2,000,000; Support for activities for children in semester 1: 11,000,000; Support for children going to military training: 5 million...
The head of the parents' association said that the expenses had not yet included the budget for the children's end-of-term party, so the estimate could be "negative" or parents would pay a separate amount after agreeing on the form of organization. He also announced that if any parents needed to know more detailed information about income and expenditure, they could express their opinions, or send a message or meet privately... At that time, the teacher was still in the classroom. I saw that no other parents spoke up. Next, the head of the association announced that for the second term, each person would continue to pay 1.3 million VND for the class fund and reduce the school fund to only 100 thousand VND, instead of 150 thousand VND like the first term.
That day when I left, I was angry at myself for being "cowardly" and not daring to say anything, even meeting the president privately to "ask for clarification" even though I had so many big questions in my head.
My child's class has 48 students, each parent pays 2.6 million a year (not including the school fund), so the total revenue is more than 120 million - too much money, has it been specifically spent on what you predict could be negative?
While my sister in the countryside has a child in high school, the maximum amount of money she has to pay for the class fund is about 1 million VND per year and there is always a little left over. As for my children in primary and secondary school in the village, the fund is about 300-400 thousand VND per year. At the end of each semester, we are given a long, double-sided printout of the specific income and expenditure. If there is anything unclear, parents can immediately speak up.
I don't know if it's because the standard of living here is high or because most other parents are like me - afraid of causing trouble, afraid of attracting attention because they don't want to negatively affect their children, so they "swallow the bitter pill" before any contributions, or because everyone thinks that such funds are reasonable?
As working people, on average, the monthly income of both husband and wife is around 20 million, so spending on extra expenses (other than studying) for students like that is a bit too much. Even though I reluctantly contribute because I think it's only twice a year, I'll try a little bit so that my child can be on par with his peers, I still feel uneasy.
After the last final meeting, my child's parents discussed that in the first semester of high school, the children all tried hard, achieved good results, and were in the top 3 best classes of the school, so to encourage them, they would organize a buffet for the children and teachers, each meal costing more than 400,000 VND, and any parents who wanted to go could contribute money. When I heard this number, I was shocked. Is our people's living standards that high now? My family honestly doesn't dare take our children to fancy restaurants, at best we'll go to a restaurant and order a bowl of pho, a portion of bun cha, banh cuon, or take them out for ice cream, fried chicken...
I wonder, in the collective, should we level the income in a way that is suitable for high-income people? I always thought that my family was not too poor and certainly many other parents have the same economic conditions as me or even more difficult.
We sometimes have to force ourselves so that our children do not lose to anyone, but the children somewhat understand the situation. When my child heard about the class going to a buffet for 400,000 VND, he said he would not go. But my husband and I do not want him to feel isolated from his friends, so we still encourage him to join for fun and to know what it is like outside to strive.
But I still wonder, am I doing the right thing? Why didn't I dare speak up? Why didn't any other parents speak up?
Duc Dung (Parent Hanoi)
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