Secret story: Why do couples make up with sex when they argue?

After an argument, some couples choose to stay silent, some talk to resolve the problem, but many couples use sex as a powerful method of reconciliation.

According to Dr. Tra Anh Duy (Men's Health Center), a love relationship always has a mixture of romantic moments and challenges in communication. Arguments are inevitable in any relationship, but the way couples face and overcome them is different.

Some couples choose to stay silent, some talk to resolve their problems, but many use sex as a powerful means of reconciliation. Make-up sex is not only common but also a behavior that reflects specific psychological, biological and social factors.

This behavior is said to have many benefits, such as reducing stress, enhancing bonding, and re-establishing relationships. But is it the best way to solve problems?

Many couples use sex as a powerful method of reconciliation.

Photo: Freepik

Benefits of reconciliation

Oxytocin Hormone - “The Love Glue”. Oxytocin, often called the “love hormone”, is released during intimate contact, especially during sex. This hormone helps increase feelings of security and bonding between couples, and eases negative emotions after conflict. According to research published in Behavioral Neuroscience , oxytocin levels increase during sex, helping to reduce stress and create a sense of closeness. This explains why couples often feel closer after arguments.

Reduce stress through cortisol. Arguing increases levels of cortisol, the stress hormone, leading to feelings of tension, anger, and fatigue. Sex stimulates the body to release dopamine and endorphins, neurotransmitters that reduce stress and improve mood. According to Levin's study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, sex is one of the most effective ways to reduce cortisol, helping people regain emotional balance.

Triggers survival instincts. From an evolutionary perspective, arguments can be seen as a threat to relationship stability. Sex after a fight helps restore feelings of safety, strengthens bonds, and ensures the stability of the relationship. Some researchers in the Archives of Sexual Behavior , suggest that sex after a fight is our body's way of resolving conflicts by prioritizing bonding over conflict.

Relieve emotional distance. Arguments often create emotional distance between two people, increasing feelings of isolation and distance. Sex can help reduce this distance quickly and powerfully. Couples who use sex as a way to reconcile often feel more satisfied with their relationship.

Express your apology without words. Sex can sometimes be a way to express your apology without using words. This can help both parties feel appreciated and forgiven.

Transform emotions . Arguments often give rise to intense emotions, such as anger or frustration. These emotions can be transformed into sexual energy in the context of reconciliation. Intense emotions, whether positive or negative, can increase sexual arousal in certain contexts.

Limitations and potential risks

According to Dr. Tra Anh Duy, despite its many benefits, sex is only a temporary solution to reduce stress and cannot replace communication to solve the root problem. If a couple always uses sex as the only tool for reconciliation, this can create an unhealthy dependence. When the problem is not completely resolved, the conflict can recur, leading to prolonged stress.

Advice from the experts

Dr. Tra Anh Duy said that sex after an argument can be a tool for reconciliation, but it needs to be combined with talking to resolve the problem. Make sure that both parties agree and feel comfortable using sex as a means of reconciliation.

Don't let sex completely replace communication in your relationship. A balance of communication and action is key to building a lasting relationship.

Although it has many benefits, such as reducing stress and strengthening bonds, sex after an argument cannot be the only solution to resolve conflicts. It is important for couples to build a solid foundation of communication and continuously cultivate mutual understanding. Use sex as part of the reconciliation process, but it cannot replace understanding and true love.

Source: https://thanhnien.vn/chuyen-tham-kin-tai-sao-khi-cai-nhau-cap-doi-lai-lam-lanh-bang-tinh-duc-185250413083115847.htm