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Parents verbally abuse, children bear "scars" in their souls

Người Lao ĐộngNgười Lao Động30/07/2023


How does negative language "destroy" children?

On the journey of growing up, there will be times when children are stubborn, disobedient or have bad habits that make their parents angry. In the heat of the moment, unable to control their emotions, many parents scold, nag, and abuse their children with negative words such as: "you idiot", "what did you eat to be so stupid?", "you can't do anything right", "look at other people's children", "you're not my child", "get out of my sight"...

Cha mẹ bạo hành bằng lời nói, con mang sẹo tâm hồn - Ảnh 1.

Parents scolding their children with negative words can easily cause psychological trauma to children (Illustration photo)

Many parents believe that disciplining their children by scolding them will not have the same negative impact on them as using whips or beatings. In fact, these highly damaging words, although they do not leave physical injuries, cut deeply into the child’s soul, forming psychological scars that are difficult to heal.

According to Master ofEducational Science, psychologist Nguyen Thi Lanh (Minh Tri Thanh Academy), language carries energy, can heal or destroy a person. Parents' language can be the nourishment that nurtures the child's soul, supporting the child's success, but can also be the garbage that makes the child stuck and fail in life.

A child who is often scolded with negative words will feel that he is worthless in the eyes of his parents, that he is not good enough, not good enough. That thought forms a psychological shadow, corroding the child's confidence, making the child become shy and self-conscious.

"Parents use damaging language that kills their children's confidence but always want them to succeed - that's a paradox" - psychologist Nguyen Thi Lanh said.

"Still Love Even When Wrong" - The Secret to Not Verbally Abusing Your Child

The female expert said that when children make mistakes or fail, they need their parents to understand and encourage them, but often they only receive scolding and criticism. Over time, children no longer feel that their parents are a safe place and tend to hide their inner feelings. Children do not want to talk or share anything with their parents anymore because they are afraid that if they speak out, they will be scolded or yelled at.

Therefore, children withdraw into themselves, holding their own thoughts, struggling to release negative emotions and increasingly losing connection with their parents. Not to mention, when feeling lost in the family, the deadlocks are not resolved, and being supplemented with the harsh words of their parents, children can have a psychological breakdown. To cover up the mental pain, children can hurt themselves, even wanting to end their lives.

Cha mẹ bạo hành bằng lời nói, con mang sẹo tâm hồn - Ảnh 3.

Master of Educational Science , psychologist Nguyen Thi Lanh

A child who is often verbally abused by his or her parents may also rebel, behave rebelliously, use negative language to respond to those around them, or argue back and yell at his or her own parents.

According to psychologist Nguyen Thi Lanh, on the journey to adulthood, every child wants to be loved, noticed, and praised to feel valuable. Therefore, instead of scolding, parents should use the language of love, the language of healing to communicate with their children, nurture their souls, help them grow up confident and happy, and shine in life.

Fine from 10 to 20 million VND for acts of mental violence against children

On December 30, 2021, the Government issued Decree No. 130/2021/ND-CP stipulating administrative sanctions for violations in the field of social protection and assistance for children. Accordingly, a fine of VND 10 million to VND 20 million shall be imposed; all costs for medical examination and treatment (if any) for children shall be borne for acts causing mental harm, insulting dignity and honor, insulting, scolding, threatening, and isolating children, affecting their development.



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