The girl who escaped the situation of her wife being kidnapped 3 times decided to study to become a lawyer.

After each time she escaped from the wife-catching situation, Sister saw it as an opportunity to fly high and far. She was determined to become a lawyer so that she could go to school, be respected and have freedom in her marriage. In addition, she could also inspire girls in remote areas.

3 times escaped wife arrest

The girl in the story above is Sung Thi So, (22 years old, Mong ethnic group, in Hong Ca commune, Tran Yen district, Yen Bai). She is a student at Hanoi Law University.

Few people know that this nun (far left) escaped wife kidnapping three times.

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The Hmong custom of wife-catching or wife-pulling is a pre-marriage ritual of couples in love. However, many people have taken advantage of this custom to "capture" girls to be their wives without their consent. This girl has been a victim of this custom three times.

When she was in 8th grade, while she was out celebrating Tet with her younger sister, she was suddenly pulled back to someone else's house. It happened so fast that Sister had no time to react. Luckily, her younger sister started crying so people around intervened.

The girl is always optimistic to overcome difficulties

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The second time, when she was in 10th grade, she was again kidnapped by a stranger the day before school started.

The third time, when preparing for the National High School Exam, many localities were also social distancing due to the Covid-19 epidemic. Because of studying for the exam, So stayed home alone instead of going to work in the fields with her parents. In the evening, two strangers from another village came to invite her to go out, but she refused. When she refused, they forcibly dragged her away. Trapped in the middle of the car, the girl could not struggle or resist.

The girl achieved many high achievements in her studies.

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That very night, she was forced to sleep with the other person. She knew that if she was caught, it would be difficult to escape home, but she was still determined to escape, unable to stay with another person.

"The next morning, I used the excuse of calling the school to get the exam schedule and secretly called my parents for help. Luckily, my father was able to convince the other person to take me home. Even though I got home safely, the other person's family and people around me still talked about me and wanted to marry them. I am very grateful to my parents for ignoring the comments around me," she shared.

She always wanted to go to school and change her life.

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Since childhood, Sister has witnessed many unhappy families. When she grew up, she witnessed many young people who got married very early and then left their husbands or vice versa. Raising 2-3 more children made their lives very miserable. Although they wanted to seek help from others, they had no one to share with, and could not even speak the common language. The journey to escape from an unhappy marriage seemed to have no way out.

She decided to become a lawyer because she wanted to protect herself. She had been arrested three times for her wife's crimes, so she knew that it was not her wish. She would not be able to influence anyone if she did not change, did not learn, and did not have a dream.

She has now defended her thesis and is in the process of graduating. She believes that once she becomes a lawyer, helping people fully realize that they can study and pursue what they want.

She has now defended her undergraduate thesis.

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Overcoming difficulties, achieving high results

So’s parents are farmers, mainly farming and raising livestock in the countryside. Neither of them went to school. She is the second child in a family of five children. Her older sister is married, her younger sister just graduated from high school, and her two younger brothers are still in school. The family has no stable income and depends on farming.

Despite financial difficulties, she convinced her parents to let her go to school after graduating from high school and promised to pay for her own tuition. At times, the family was so poor that they had no slippers or warm clothes to wear in the winter, even though they had to walk about 3 km to school.

To cover her living expenses in the capital, Sister often worked as a housemaid, waitress in restaurants, cafes, and other office jobs. There were times when she worked multiple jobs at the same time to earn money to stay in Hanoi and continue her studies.

"Until 2020, I still couldn't buy a warm coat. At that time, I went from Hanoi to Thai Nguyen to visit my sick sister because she only had one thin coat, so I gave her my only warm coat. On the whole way back to Hanoi, I cried a lot. I cried because I felt sorry for myself, my sister, and the hardships of my parents," the girl was moved.

Friends are also proud of Sister's achievements (4th from right)

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Unlike the gossip and criticism from the neighbors who said: "Girls are just girls", Sister's parents always encouraged their daughter with all their might. Every time Sister brought home a certificate of merit, their eyes were always filled with pride, trust and boundless love for their child.

Determined to change her life and the lives of the girls around her after being a victim of wife kidnapping three times, Sister was chosen as one of two Vietnamese representatives at the Asia- Pacific Regional Conference on Child Marriage Prevention.

In her presentation at the conference, she mentioned the general situation of child marriage in Vietnam and the Hmong community in particular. "Nothing is impossible to change, if we have the opportunity to do so. And I believe that there will be people willing to stand up to protect us, so if we encounter such cases, girls should call for help. We should get married when we are of legal age, mature enough in terms of awareness, knowledge and strength to protect ourselves," she wrote in her presentation.

In addition, she is also one of 15 members of the Spark fund in Southeast Asia under the Global Children's Fund. Here, she hopes to have more benefits for the disadvantaged (ethnic minorities, people with disabilities or LGBT), no language restrictions to add more learning opportunities for young people, especially in remote areas.

The girl always hopes that people in remote areas are free to choose their lives.

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Mr. Sung Cong Cua (43 years old), So's father, said that he respected his daughter's decision. When he heard that his daughter was being taken away to be married, the man was heartbroken because he always saw his daughter's desire to go to school.

"I consider it my responsibility as a parent to protect my child. I have many sleepless nights because I feel sorry for my child and worry that my daughter will not be able to bear it after being arrested so many times. I always tell my child: "Your body is given to you by your parents, but this life is yours. Whatever you want to do, try to get it," Mr. Cua said.

In the future, she will continue to persevere in the law industry.

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The father is also very proud because his daughter is the first person in the village to attend university and even travel to many countries in the region. The family always wishes Sister good health, happiness and to achieve many of her goals.

Sister's two younger siblings are also in school and she will try to pay for both of their tuition fees.

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Mr. Chang A Vang, Secretary of the Hong Ca Commune Youth Union, highly appreciated Sister's academic achievements. The commune's Youth Union considered her a typical example of academic excellence and hoped other members would follow her example.

"For the local H'Mong community, the rate of students going to school after high school is not high. In addition, the custom of wife-catching in the locality, although reduced compared to many years ago, has not completely ended. I believe that with Sister's awareness and efforts, she will spread it to everyone," Mr. Vang shared.

- Received a certificate of merit from the Ethnic Committee to honor outstanding and exemplary ethnic minority students and youth in 2019 - 2020 - Silver Prize in the writing contest "Iron Spirit - Iron Women" and First Prize in the writing contest "Home - Shelter of the Soul" - Deputy Head of Human Resources, National Member of the Youth Advisory Board of Plan International Vietnam - 1 of 2 Vietnamese representatives at the Asia- Pacific Regional Conference on Child Marriage Prevention - 1 of 15 members of the Spark Fund in Southeast Asia under the Global Children's Fund - Delegate to conferences such as: Pioneer Youth Initiative of the United Nations Children's Fund, Youth Roundtable on Development No. 16 of the United Nations.

Thanhnien.vn

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