Thierry Henry's battle with depression

On the recent program The Diary Of A CEO, French football legend Thierry Henry opened up about his past suffering from depression and the high expectations from his father.

Thierry Henry when he was assistant coach of the Belgian national team. Photo: AFP

“I must have been depressed throughout my career,” Henry said. “Did I know? No. Did I do something? Obviously not. But I adapted in a way. I lied for a very long time because society wasn’t ready to hear what I had to say.”

Henry revealed that his father Antoine regularly criticised his performances on the pitch as a child and spent his childhood trying to please him. The French football legend later said he tried to please others throughout his entire playing career, comparing it to wearing a cape.

"I knew that before but I was lying to myself," Henry said. "I made sure those emotions didn't go too far, so I put on the cape. But when you're not a player anymore, you can't wear that cape anymore."

It was only when football was shut down by the Covid-19 pandemic in 2020 and he was stuck in Montreal, Canada, thousands of miles away from his family, that Henry admitted to his mental health problems. "We tend to run away from things rather than face them, that's what we always do. We try to keep busy, we try to avoid them or not think about them," the former Arsenal striker said. "Then Covid-19 came and I wondered why I ran away. I was isolated and not being able to see my kids for a year was really hard. I don't even have to explain it."

The 46-year-old cried every day and recalled painful childhood problems. "Almost every day I cried, for no reason, tears just came out," Henry expressed. "I don't know if it was necessary to happen or not. It was strange, but in a good way. There are things I can't control and I don't try to. From a young age, I was told not to show that I was vulnerable. If you cry, what will they think? I cried but maybe that was young Henry crying. He was crying because of what he didn't get."

Henry (right) competes for the ball with Beppe Bergomi in the 1996-1997 UEFA Cup semi-final. Photo: UEFA

Henry recalls a story from his teenage years, when he scored six goals in a 6-0 win for his youth team, but his father was still not happy. "I was 15 and you could tell who had potential. My team won 6-0 and I scored six goals," Henry said. "I know my dad's temperament, I could tell if he was happy or not. I turned around, I could tell from any posture if he was happy or not. We got in the car and no one said anything. Then he asked me if I was happy. Should I say no? Yes. 'I'm okay? You shouldn't be like that anyway because you missed the goal, that cross'. We got to my mum's house and I had my head down. My mum asked me if I lost. It always happened like that."

Henry said he had an "epiphany" when he decided to return to Montreal after spending some time with his children. That led to the Frenchman stepping down as Montreal's head coach ahead of the 2021 season. "I was about to leave again, say goodbye to my children. Then I put my bag down and everyone started crying," Henry recalled. "From my nanny to my girlfriend to the kids. For the first time, I felt like people loved me, not just as a soccer star with awards. I felt like a human being."

The 46-year-old former striker continued: "They cried for me. It was the first time I felt that and the first time I was nurtured with love. I put my bag down, stayed and stopped coaching in Montreal. 'What am I doing?'. They loved me, not Henry, and I felt great."

Henry made his professional debut on 31 August 1994 for Monaco in a 2-0 defeat to Nice in Ligue 1. At that time, Monaco coach Arsene Wenger recognized Henry's potential and moved him from a centre-forward to a winger. Henry helped Monaco win the Ligue 1 title in the 1996-1997 season before moving to Juventus.

Henry celebrates with Wenger after scoring a goal for Arsenal in the Premier League. Photo: AFP

After an unsuccessful season at Juventus, Henry reunited with Wenger at Arsenal and enjoyed great success. The striker, nicknamed "Son of the Wind", scored 175 goals, won the Premier League Golden Boot four times, and contributed greatly to Arsenal winning two Premier League titles and three FA Cups between 1999 and 2007.

With Barca, Henry won a Champions League, two La Ligas and a Copa del Rey. After leaving Barca in 2010, Henry joined the New York Red Bulls in the MLS, where he played for five seasons and had a return to Arsenal on loan in the 2011-2012 season.

At the international level, Henry also won all major titles with the French team including the 1998 World Cup, Euro 2000 and the 2003 FIFA Confederations Cup.

In his coaching career, Henry has been an assistant twice with the Belgian national team, leading Monaco, Montreal Impact. This former striker is currently the coach of the French U21 and Olympic team preparing to compete in the men's football of the 2024 Paris Olympics.

Hong Duy

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