Article by author Ly Lam on Toutiao platform (China)
It is a mistake to spoil your daughter too much.
The issue of favoritism towards boys or girls is a sensitive issue, many people do not want to admit that there is always a certain preference for one of the children in the family. As in the case of my family, our daughter Ha Linh is more pampered than our eldest son Ha Huy. Partly because the two children are much apart in age, Ha Linh is always treated like a little princess, never having to do hard work.
Ha Linh went to school with her parents taking her to and from school, all her demands were easily met, giving priority to the daughter in every situation while the son had to be more independent in everything. My husband and I never scolded our daughter harshly, only gently reminded her or ignored her when she made mistakes. However, when our daughter grew up, we realized the downside of this way of raising her.
My child is very stubborn, always needs someone to take care of her but rarely listens to her parents. After graduating from university, Ha Linh did not look for a job herself but relied on her parents to find one for her, otherwise she would just stay home and hang out with friends. My husband and I were helpless, not knowing whether to blame our child or ourselves.
When Ha Linh got married, her family still supported her with a part of the house rent. However, my daughter wanted more than that when she asked me to borrow money from her savings to open a clothing store. In fact, the fashion business in the area where I live is already saturated, and the stores that open have to pay off the premises in a short time.
So even though she promised to pay it back, we understood that our daughter lacked perseverance and knowledge of business and fashion, so the possibility of failure was very high. Ha Linh was surprised when her parents refused to borrow money, so she stormed off and did not visit her parents again for half a year.
Even though my husband got sick later, my daughter only called to ask about him, using the excuse of being busy with work and never taking care of him fully. Only my son and his wife were always attentive and devoted to their parents, so there were times when I felt I was wrong to be too biased towards my daughter in the past.
Unexpected decision in the will
My husband suddenly passed away half a year ago. This made me realize that I was getting old. I decided to consult a lawyer to make a will soon. I plan to have my son inherit our house worth 900,000 yuan (3.1 billion VND) and my daughter will receive a portion of the money in the savings account.
Ha Huy and his wife are still living in a rented house due to the high cost of raising their children. We have never given them any valuable material possessions. My daughter-in-law has always been good to my family and fulfilled her duties as a good wife and daughter-in-law, so I think this is the property the children deserve to receive.
The will had not yet been announced, but my daughter heard the news and came to my house to question me about the reason for favoring her brother and sister. Only then did I remind Ha Linh of how my husband and I raised her more favorably than Ha Huy. However, my daughter still insisted that the difference in the property division meant that her mother loved her brother more than her, and demanded that the will be changed so that she could have capital to start a business.
I still firmly disagree because if I continue to spoil my child too much, he will never realize that he needs to be independent, and will only want to rely on others. After hearing his mother's refusal, Ha Linh angrily left without even turning back to say goodbye to her mother.
Neighbors and family members, when they knew about the incident, sympathized with my actions. They also hoped that one day the mother and daughter would talk to help Ha Linh grow up and there would be no more unfortunate discord in the family.
Kim Linh
Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/tu-choi-cho-con-gai-vay-tien-nhung-san-sang-de-con-trai-thua-ke-3-ty-dong-khong-ai-trach-toi-thien-vi-vi-1-nguyen-do-172240912090429379.htm
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