The honest sharing of a 40-year-old husband who had an affair for 11 years

An anonymous, 40-year-old man with an 11-year history of cheating exposed five common misconceptions many women have about cheating husbands on the show Dark Horse.

Men can still love their wives, spend time with their families and still have affairs.

This is the first thing this man shared, and also the biggest misconception women have when they hear the word "adultery". Usually, people think that men who have affairs will neglect their families, rarely come home early to have dinner with their wives and children, or always "disappear" every weekend to spend time with their mistresses. However, he is not like that. Perhaps this is also the biggest factor that helped him have an affair for 11 years.

"I think men who have affairs and neglect their wives and children in particular or family matters in general are very poor!" - this person affirmed.

Men who have affairs but do not want to leave their wives, they tell their mistresses that they do not want a divorce because they want their children to have both a father and a mother. But the truth is that he only loves himself the most. Illustrative photo

Infidelity does not mean love

Sometimes men cheat simply because they need a new experience with a new woman. There doesn't have to be any love or passion involved.

" I know many people will probably frown when hearing this and ask back that if it's not love, why have an affair. But from my thoughts and experiences, affair and love are not two sides of the same coin. In other words, they have nothing to do with each other " - this man affirmed.

There is no way to control a cheating man if he is really good at it.

After discovering that her husband is having an affair, the common action of many wives is to control their husband's spending and free time to prevent him from "going back to his old ways".

However, this man believes that all of those solutions are ineffective.

"A man will still cheat and will always find time to cheat even when his wife controls him to the maximum extent," he emphasized.

Even after having an affair, men are still clearly aware of the role of their wives in their lives.

"All men who commit adultery are greedy, this cannot be denied or disproved. But if forced to choose between wife and family, I am sure that few men would choose their mistress, unless he is very bored with his wife. Men who are bored with their wives will definitely commit adultery, but that does not mean that all men who commit adultery are bored with their wives" - this man said.

Believe it when men say "it was just a moment of excitement"

Not all men spend time and money to pamper their mistresses. Women will never believe when men explain that "it was just a moment of excitement, I really didn't think much of it". But this man advises women to believe this.

"I don't think I'm qualified to advise anyone, I just want to share my thoughts and perspective as a man who has been having an affair for 11 years and still fulfills his responsibilities to his family. I really don't spend much time or money on my mistress. I also don't really think much about it other than experiencing it for myself. For me, it was just a moment of excitement" - this man shared.

Men think they are good at hiding their affairs, but never underestimate a woman's sixth sense.

Robert Weiss, author of many books on marriage research, has pointed out that most married men have affairs only because of desire and want to try new feelings.

Many men choose mistresses who are not as beautiful or talented as their wives. However, the truth is that he is attracted to girls who possess personality traits that his wife does not have.

For example, if his wife is loud and noisy at home and has a strong temperament, they will be attracted to a girl with a gentle and reserved personality.

Because the nature of adultery is for satisfaction, they do not think they have any responsibility here. Illustration photo

For men, it is a new feeling that has never been felt before. Especially when all the freshness in marriage has passed, new things will create a temptation that is difficult to resist.

In fact, men can cheat because they are sure that their wives will not know. Once they want to have an affair with another woman, men will be good at lying, hiding, and using tricks so that their wives will not know.

They take advantage of their wives' trust, coaxing them with gifts and sweet gestures. The richer a man is, the more he knows how to please his wife when he has an affair.

The more clever a man is, the better he is at pleasing his wife when he has an affair. Men who have an affair are often very confident in themselves, even disregarding their wife's feelings and sixth sense.

Women are not as naive and foolish as men often think. A woman's sixth sense is really no joke.

Many men think they are so talented that they can "outsmart" their wives. But the truth is that their wives are just silently watching them act out their acts. Or she is secretly calculating the pros and cons after the divorce, or preparing for the best life after the divorce.

No woman is stupid enough to suspect her husband of cheating. They just choose to stay silent, or face their husband directly.

In life and marriage, women are always careful about even the smallest details. Therefore, just one unusual expression, action or behavior from their husband can make them suspicious.

And as the number of abnormalities increases, a woman's instinct tells her something is wrong. She will start investigating and discover the truth about her husband.

One of the most recognizable signs of a cheating man is the amount of money he has to spend on love affairs. When having an affair, husbands often have to spend a large amount of money to "feed" their lover. Food, motels, hotels... will be a huge amount. And to pay for this, they will have to carry a lot of cash or use credit cards regularly.

Financial statements will easily attract the wife at home. Once or twice it may be possible to quibble, but in the long run, the woman will naturally learn to reason.

Many Chinese women decide not to get married.

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/chia-se-chan-thuc-cua-nguoi-chong-40-tuoi-da-ngoai-tinh-11-nam-nhung-vo-khong-he-biet-17224031115395993.htm