Wedding guests are there to have fun, don't invite too many to... make money.

When inviting to a wedding, should you only invite people who are really close to you to join in the fun, don't calculate profits and losses? - Illustration: UNPLASH

The article 'Remember to invite to the wedding but don't go, don't even send any money' on Tuoi Tre Online received many comments from readers with two different opinions.

Some sympathized with the bride and groom, others blamed the host for not knowing how to arrange the party, inviting too many people they were not close to, and said that guests should not be blamed for not attending or not sending money if the wedding party "lost money".

"Since when are guests responsible for the profits and losses of a party?"

Having experienced guests not attending or sending money, two readers daot****@gmail.com and TVT shared indignantly:

"At my son's wedding, I invited him but he didn't come. When we met, he apologized and said congratulations, but I didn't accept. Not long after, he invited me to his son's wedding. I had to go and was happy but I wasn't happy. In life, many people behave so boringly."

"I was like the people in the article. I went to the wedding of a colleague's two children, but when I invited my two children to the wedding, he did not attend and did not send a congratulatory card even once. It was very frustrating."

Reader Ý Cò expressed his thoughts: "Only when things go wrong do you know who your friends are, so I just play tricks and then slowly eliminate them. Up to now, although I only have a dozen close friends, it's better than a crowd."

Reader Tran Minh thinks that when people are invited to a wedding, it is up to them whether they go or not. Why is it that because we have already gone to their wedding, now we invite them back, they have to go to return the favor, if they don't go, they will blame each other.

"Now there is the practice of printing QR codes on wedding invitations, and those who don't attend can transfer money. The recipient sees the wedding invitation as an IOU, losing all meaning of a happy event," this reader said, adding that only those who put their own profit and loss above the true meaning of the wedding party feel resentful and upset.

Similarly, two readers Uyen and Nhu have the same opinion when they think that the profit or loss of a wedding has nothing to do with the guests.

Attending a wedding is voluntary, not an obligation. I don’t understand since when the guests are responsible for the profits and losses of a wedding or engagement.

The bride and groom themselves should know how to arrange who to invite. If they invite everyone and then people don't come, they are really treating the wedding as a business for profit.

I have seen many cases where colleagues who I did not know, only met a few times, still invited me to their wedding. People who had stopped seeing each other for nearly 2 years still contacted me just to invite me to their wedding.

The bride and groom themselves should know how to arrange who to invite, otherwise if they invite everyone and then people don't come, they are treating the wedding as a business for profit. Not to mention that there are brides who even ask guests to pay money because they will "lose" if they give wedding gifts. Since when do guests have to take responsibility for the profit and loss of the party?

A person nicknamed Dear Reader said that one should be happy on their happy day. "If the purpose of the wedding is to make money, then you should learn more about "risk management" and learn to accept risks," this reader said.

Sharing the same opinion, reader Ngoc emphasized that as long as we still calculate the pros and cons of a wedding, the matter has not yet come to an end. If we consider the wedding as a happy occasion, invite only those who are really close to us and do not think about profits or losses, then we will not turn our backs on each other over trivial matters.

"I once forgot about the wedding and forgot to send wedding money. It was only after more than 4 months that I remembered and sent it. Instead of exposing myself like the article, my friend listened and understood that I really forgot and didn't mean it. After that, we were very happy, I helped him with whatever he needed. After reading this article - I feel extremely lucky because my friend is not petty," wrote the account namb****@gmail.com .

"Even though we have been to many weddings, it doesn't mean we have to invite them again. We need to consider carefully. The idea of ​​getting married to have some capital to do business is outdated. Thinking like that will only waste money and cause debt," said reader Minh Tu .

Illustration: UNPLASH

Consider the empty dinner table as a backup dinner table.

From another perspective, some people sympathize with the bride and groom, saying that if they cannot attend the wedding, they should still send money and at least apologize because they are invited to celebrate because they like them.

As a middle-aged person, reader Pham Thiet Hung gently observed: The person who invites the wedding but does not receive a response from the invitee should not be concerned. The invitee does not attend, does not send wishes, does not send a greeting card, does not send an envelope, does not apologize, it is okay. After the wedding, you will know who your true friends are.

"For those who you thought were your friends, but now turn out to be different, just act like nothing happened. Without them, the wedding would still be a success. Every wedding party always has a number of backup dishes. Consider the wedding dishes prepared but no one attends as backup dishes.

On the other hand, we also recognize ourselves. In life, there have been times when we have not satisfied someone," this reader's comment received the agreement of many people.

How to accommodate the right number of guests?

From his story, a reader from Da Nang suggested: "When I got married, my wife and I took out a notebook to write down the guest details to order food portions.

In addition to the guest name column, I have a few more columns for each guest: Going, not going, going as a couple, going with a small child, not sure, sending, not sending. Because of this detail, my wedding has neither too many nor too few, just right, a very nice number."

Source: https://tuoitre.vn/khach-du-dam-cuoi-la-de-chung-vui-dung-moi-nhieu-de-kiem-loi-20240520130012819.htm