Quail with tail tucked in

Illustration: Ly Long

Usually, only poor fishermen, who do not have a boat or a large boat, and are not strong enough to follow the boat to go out to sea for a long time, choose this precarious fishing job. When the sun is about to set, the whole group gathers their baskets on the big boat to hitchhike out to sea to go fishing. Whatever they get, each basket has to pay a portion, and pay the boat owner for fuel. That's how it is, no one wants to work for free, and that's how life is, and neither the boat owner nor the fishing companions feel guilty. They finish their dinner, check all their equipment, add a pot of hot tea and some sweets for a late night snack, then the whole group gets on the boat and goes out, chatting until it gets dark. After a while, they reach the fishing anchor, the big boat drops each basket one by one, and then everyone does their own thing. The big boat circles around to see if the lights are on, counts to see if there are enough baskets, then runs to another place to take care of themselves. Also cast nets, also fish at night to earn extra income until the next morning to come back to pick up, sometimes tie a bunch of fish behind the boat and then drag each other back.

After four days, incense lights lit up a stretch of the beach, along with the soulless, desperate, and angry eyes of the relatives on the shore who had not yet learned the exact news about their husbands and children who had been in the accident. Everyone advised each other to just set up an altar for the unfortunate person, then prayed and waited for a miracle to happen to each family. Li's father had a disability in his legs that made him a little weak when walking, so he chose this job. His mother bought and sold fish at the fish market in Dau Con, and his old grandmother also worked hard to help cook for the whole family. Before Li, there were two other children, but they could not raise them. Before he was born, the whole family was like a funeral home, no one bothered to talk to him. When he was born, there was so much joy, his grandmother carried him around the neighborhood to show him off, while he grew up following the wind and the waves. So God has failed her, counting to today, it has been a month, her grandmother and mother cried until their eyes were swollen, every time she looked at the picture on the altar, she collapsed. She groaned, oh my god, oh my god, you are only in your forties, why did you leave so soon! She struggled, pounding her head and chest, hugging Li tightly, crying endlessly. Her mother also cried but only for a while, just standing there hugging each other and crying, what would they eat, they had to grit their teeth and live, who would take care of Li!? Li was only a few years old, he didn't know anything, since the day his mother gave birth to him, he had lived with his grandmother, receiving inspiration from her, eating, drinking and playing were all from her, he didn't know anything when his father passed away. Seeing his grandmother crying, his mother crying, he cried too, but then he seemed to suddenly remember something, wiped his nose and ran to the beach to play in the waves. It just kept going like that with time, no sickness, no pain, no stomachache, no headache, just round and stealthily growing up with the years, that's why they called it Li. When he was six years old, his grandmother sent him to school, after school and when he came home, he rushed to the sea, his life seemed to be attached to the sea. He bathed, he swam, he played with the waves, when he grew up a little bit, not knowing who told him, he found a bamboo hook, with a sharp bicycle spoke attached to the front, the end was broken horizontally, then he followed fishing boats to steal fish to sell for money. He was cursed a lot, slapped and kicked in the butt, but he was stubborn, only the curses of "fatherless son, naughty son" were absorbed, the more he absorbed, the more stubborn he became. After finishing fifth grade, he stopped studying, his mother begged him to try harder to study, he slowly turned his head to look out to sea without answering a word. However, at this time, he felt that his mother was a bit strange, she often took care of him more. Sometimes he also felt warm, he loved his grandmother ten times and his mother eight or nine times. Now he had the appearance of a man, 12 years old, not too young. At 12 years old, he looked mature and neat, in the sea he swam as fast as a fish, on the shore his legs walked lightly as if gliding on the sand, his slim and sturdy figure was liked by everyone who saw him. Mother and son often joked with each other, but he felt that his mother was strange lately, often sitting alone in a daze, rarely talking to his grandmother, and his grandmother also looked at his mother with the experienced eyes of an old person, there was something that he and his grandmother had not yet seen, had not yet expected. Every day he saw that his mother seemed to be getting younger, younger than her age of nearly forty. After hours of hard work, calculating every penny at the fish market, recently his mother often went out with many new acquaintances at the market. Once his grandmother said "watch out for your mother", but he didn't know what to watch out for.

Having dropped out of school, he was bored of staying idle all the time, so he followed fishing boats to go to sea a few times. The people on the boat told him to come back home and ask to stay home so he could follow the boat to sea as a younger brother. He was so happy that he ran home and shouted to his mother and grandmother that he could go to sea. So he went, went as his destiny had been predetermined, being a younger brother on a boat going to sea was not too hard, as long as he did not get seasick. Whatever anyone told him to do, he did it without hesitation, being young and reckless, he gradually got used to the work of the vast sea, he felt excited and passionate about the boat, the net, each kind of fresh fish, each shrimp and squid caught in the net, in the bag. Going to sea, except for the loss, three parts of the income went to the boat owner, the remaining seven parts were divided equally among his friends, the boat owner who was also the captain also got a share, but his share as a younger brother was only half. It was okay, he felt proud of the share he received for the first time in his life with his own efforts. The boat docked, every time, he took the net bag of fish and ran home to give it to his grandmother to take to the market for his mother to sell. He turned around the boat to do some chores and look after the boat for others to go home, and at night he had to sleep to look after the boat. Just like that, his life went up and down with each wave, with each tail of the boat turning out to sea, with each net bag of fish getting heavier as he worked, learning more about the profession of going to sea. Since the day he got on the boat to go to sea, he rarely saw his mother. One time, he missed her so much, he took the net bag of fish and went straight to the market to see her. Mother and son looked at each other silently, his eyes filled with tears, and his mother seemed awkward. The people in the market looked at him with sympathetic, wistful eyes. Until one day...

His grandmother sat on the doorstep, saw him coming back and said: Take him to the market for your mother, then see where he is, he hasn't come back since yesterday. Feeling that something was wrong, he rushed to the market, looked around but couldn't find his mother. Some people who traded with him knew him, called him over and whispered: "Your mother said she hasn't known Saigon yet so she followed the car there to see, she'll probably be back in a few days". He was bewildered, wondering to himself "where did she go, there's no one at home". So sad, he sold the fish and went straight to the boat after asking an acquaintance to take all the money back to his grandmother. Really strange, why did he go, and why didn't he tell anyone? He carried that confusion, that doubt, that resentment onto the boat and then like a lost soul. He forgot the beginning and the end, forgot everything. He returned from one trip at sea but didn't see his mother, returned from two trips also didn't see her, no news, and no one knew or knew but didn't say anything. One night, sitting at the bow of the boat looking out at the vast ocean waves, he suddenly burst into tears, silently calling out "Mom" twice, "I'm only 15 years old, how could you leave me?" The whole boat gathered around to comfort and advise him, "It's okay, she'll be back in a few days, it's nothing!" He cried and suddenly shouted out loud, "Where did she go?" God, where did she go, how would we know!! Time passed silently, everything seemed to be forgotten, as if it was silent, but he couldn't forget. Now he only had his grandmother, she was very old and weak, the recent shock seemed unbearable, every time he came back from the sea, they would cry whenever they looked at each other. He was very angry but he wasn't angry with his mother, his body felt numb, stiff, but he secretly hoped that one day his mother would return. He lit a stick of incense for his father, he prayed to his father so that his mother would return.

As time passed, he no longer followed the old boat, now he had become a real boat mate, skilled in the profession, strong in health, a muscular young man, with a beautiful, slender body like an athlete. The boat owner once joked but it seemed true: "I have two daughters, whichever one you like, I will marry", he just smiled and walked away, he still thought a lot about his mother. His grandmother had passed away, he was now alone, his life was like a quail. Like the sentence his grandmother used to sing to him to sleep in the past: "Who raised you, a tailless quail? Yes, sir, I grew up alone". Coming back from each sea trip, sitting on the boat watching the boat owner's daughter weigh fish for her customers, glancing at him and smiling. Thinking back on his life, he felt so sad. Oh quail!!

Source: https://baobinhthuan.com.vn/con-cut-cuc-duoi-130815.html