'Season of showing off children': Are parents so eager to be praised and applauded online?

As scheduled, when students receive their final report cards and certificates, a series of photos and posts of parents showing off their children appear on social media.

Having just returned from the year-end parent-teacher conference, Ms. Bui An Ngoc (35 years old, Dong Da, Hanoi ) immediately shared her son's report card and certificate of merit on social media platforms. Her son had just finished 5th grade and was in the group of students with high achievements in the class. In addition to sharing the certificate and report card, Ms. Ngoc said that she is always willing to post any positive marks of her son in studying, no matter how small.

"I don't see anything wrong with spreading my child's joy. Over the past year, my child has been studying on his own, overcoming his fear of Math to get a 9 at the end of the semester. I have seen my child progress step by step, my child is a good student, why shouldn't I be proud?" , Ms. Ngoc said.

Since her child entered first grade, she has always kept certificates and awards as a way to record childhood memories and remind her that all efforts are worth it. “I made an album called ‘My child’s journey to adulthood’ on Facebook, recording all achievements. Now, in the digital age, sharing online is very normal,” said Ms. Ngoc.

Each post about her son’s academic achievements attracts hundreds of likes and many congratulations. Most of the comments praise her son’s diligence and skillful parenting. According to Ms. Ngoc, these positive responses are a great source of encouragement. “I only worry when my son has nothing outstanding. But if he really studies well, I am willing to share and there is no reason to hide that pride,” the female parent affirmed.

Parents praise their children's achievements on social networks. (Photo: Screenshot)

Contrary to Ms. Ngoc's point of view, Ms. Bui Quynh Chi (40 years old, Thanh Tri, Hanoi) disagrees with the trend of parents massively showing off their children's report cards and certificates of merit on social networks. According to her, behind these seemingly harmless images are many hidden psychological consequences that not everyone realizes.

“Sharing a little joy is fine, but when every family posts their report cards, certificates, awards, etc., will it unintentionally put pressure on children who have not yet achieved outstanding results? Adults easily fall into the race of showing off their children without realizing it. Is it true that parents are so eager to be praised and applauded online?” , Ms. Chi questioned.

Female parents are concerned that social networks are gradually becoming a "virtual stage" where children's academic achievements are sometimes turned into tools to enhance their parents' image.

"I once witnessed a boy burst into tears after the final exam because he did not receive a certificate of merit, while his friends were all photographed and posted online. At that time, I wondered, is achievement still a personal joy or a burden of comparison?" , said Ms. Chi, adding that each child has their own rate of development and should not be weighed through photos and numbers.

Showing off children's achievements on social media has received mixed opinions. (Illustration photo)

According to Dr. Nguyen Tung Lam, Vice President of the Vietnam Association ofEducational Psychology, after a year of hard work, children's good results need to be recognized and rewarded. However, parents should consider and ask their children's opinions before posting on social networks.

"Children studying well and practicing well is something that everyone is very proud of. Rewarding and praising children is very necessary but should be considered within the private scope of family, relatives, and class. Social networks are where information reaches everyone. Sometimes, posting personal information on social networks poses many unforeseen risks," said Dr. Nguyen Tung Lam.

According to Mr. Lam, showing off that your children are good and studious will not motivate them to continue trying, but will inadvertently create pressure for them.

Sharing the same view, Dr. Ho Lam Giang, an educational psychology expert, said that excessive and one-sided praise of children gives parents illusions about their children's omnipotence and comprehensiveness. As a result, when their children's scores are not high, parents find it difficult to accept this failure, giving rise to feelings of disappointment and irritability, leading to yelling and spanking.

In the long run, it can form a mentality of blaming, the child cannot do the test because the question is difficult, the child gets a bad grade because the teacher is bullying or the child will not be successful in the future because of bad timing, the boss does not know how to use them. Not to mention, under pressure from parents, many students will still strive to achieve results, to be "praised" and "showed off" rather than for the purpose of accumulating knowledge and practicing skills. The child's learning will gradually lose its meaning.

"The idea of ​​showing off comprehensive academic achievements unintentionally pushes students who study lopsidedly or unevenly to the weak group. There are many ways to encourage and acknowledge children's academic achievements. Parents should not overuse social networks to show off as they do now because that is one of the reasons why the achievement disease persists," Dr. Giang emphasized.

Kim Anh

Source: https://vtcnews.vn/mua-khoe-con-phu-huynh-khao-khat-duoc-ca-tung-tung-ho-tren-mang-den-vay-sao-ar945178.html