Tuan Hung has always been indifferent to March 8th, believing that if society still allows a day dedicated solely to women, then it has not yet achieved complete gender equality.
The 21-year-old, a university student in Hanoi, was always taught that International Women's Day on March 8th is a day to support gender equality. On this day, women need to be cared for by society and compensated for the hardships and sacrifices they endure throughout the year. But Hung believes that care and respect are a long-term process, not something that happens on just one day.
"Women are like flowers; they can't be beautiful if they're only cared for once or twice a year, but every day, every hour," Hung said. The young man asserted that love doesn't need to wait for a holiday, giving flowers doesn't need to wait for a special occasion, and texting doesn't need a reason.
This is also the reason why Hung hasn't given gifts to his grandmother and mother on March 8th for many years. Instead, when he returns home, he always proactively cooks or buys practical gifts for everyone whenever he receives his monthly part-time salary.
Viet Tu, 27, an IT employee in Ho Chi Minh City, considers March 8th just another ordinary day. According to him, buying flowers and gifts on this occasion is merely a marketing ploy by shops to inflate prices or due to herd mentality. This mindset has led to constant nagging and harsh comments from his wife, leaving him feeling burdened and frustrated every time he returns home.
"I don't like giving gifts if I'm forced to. Besides, there are many occasions throughout the year for couples to celebrate, not just on March 8th, because everywhere else is crowded and expensive," Tú said.
According to him, nagging should only happen with men who don't care about their wives and children. Gifts then become like a once-a-year reward, giving women a moment of pride, only for them to be left alone to manage housework, work, and childcare. If you have a sincere heart, there are a thousand ways to express it; it's not necessary to give gifts on special occasions.
A young man is choosing flowers to give his girlfriend on International Women's Day (March 8th) on Nguyen Thi Dinh Street, Cau Giay District, Hanoi, on the afternoon of March 5th. Photo: TN
According to education expert Vu Thu Huong, former lecturer at Hanoi Pedagogical University, the aversion of some men to International Women's Day on March 8th is understandable.
March 8th originated from the international movement for women's equality, stemming from the International Socialist Women's Congress held in Denmark in 1910 with the slogan "Eight-hour workday - Equal work - Equal pay - Protection of mothers and children". This day therefore reminds everyone that women still face many disadvantages, and society must do more to promote gender equality, as well as acknowledge their sacrifices.
However, the meaning of this day has changed from the past; Vietnamese women are now treated more fairly. Their roles are increasingly valued, transcending the confines of the family. Many argue that honoring sacrifice as a noble quality is tantamount to encouraging women to continue sacrificing. If that were the case, society would further suppress them in accepting and enduring disadvantages.
"Therefore, many believe that having a day dedicated solely to women is not enough to achieve complete gender equality," Ms. Huong said.
A survey conducted by VnExpress in early March found that nearly 70% of readers believe there are many ways to express affection, and it's not necessary to choose occasions like March 8th. Articles on social media sharing this topic have also received much attention. Most opinions suggest that this day is now largely a formality, and not everyone fully understands its meaning.
According to psychologist Nguyen Thi Minh, a lecturer at the Ho Chi Minh National Academy of Public Administration, there are three main reasons why some men are indifferent to International Women's Day (March 8th).
Firstly, collective activities celebrating this holiday, from schools and homes to workplaces, are often repetitive, formal, and easily become boring. Secondly, organized appreciation events often require women to do more, such as performing arts or participating in domestic skills competitions, making them feel tired instead of being honored. In addition, the high prices of flowers and gifts have led many to complain about the expense.
Despite being a woman, Thu Lan, a civil servant in Thai Binh, is not enthusiastic about March 8th. Instead of resting and relaxing on this day, for the entire week before, the 25-year-old woman has to practice performing arts, sew ao dai (traditional Vietnamese dress) for a workplace beauty contest, and in some years even compete in cooking competitions within the office or attend seminars honoring women.
"It's not interesting at all, it just adds to the stress. The beginning of the year is already busy, and now I have to waste time on these pointless activities," Lan said.
To avoid falling into a state of depression like Lan's, expert Vu Thu Huong suggests that a gift-giving holiday isn't necessary, but rather a day for society to reflect on the value of women in the family. This would give them more opportunities to strive and assert their position.
Expert Nguyen Thi Minh asserts that giving flowers and gifts is merely a formality. According to her, some husbands don't give flowers or say flowery words, but they respect their wives and work together to raise their children and build a warm, happy family. Even without flowers or gifts, the woman is still happy because the greatest thing she receives is her husband's love and sense of responsibility. However, if a husband gives gifts but neglects his wife and children, or even behaves inappropriately, then neither flowers nor gifts are meaningful.
"Fresh flowers wilt over time, gifts are used up quickly, only genuine affection remains," Mrs. Minh said.
Hai Hien - Quynh Nguyen
Source
Comment (0)