Refusing to be a 'liaison officer', Vietnamese girl 'woos' Belgian man 5 years younger

Having traveled to Vietnam in 2015, Pim Gilles Felix Pluut immediately fell in love with Da Nang – his first destination. To date, except for two years spent in Belgium due to the Covid-19 pandemic, Pim has lived in Vietnam for seven years and is married to a Vietnamese woman.

The love story between the Belgian man and Ho Thi My Quyen, a woman from Da Nang, has also gone through all the ups and downs to reach where it is today.

Pim and My Quyen currently live in Da Nang.

The teacher "wooed" her student who was 5 years younger.

My Quyen (35 years old) said that she was Pim's first Vietnamese teacher - Pim is 5 years younger than her.

Back then, Pim had just arrived in Vietnam, and because he fell in love with Da Nang "at first sight," he decided he would live in Vietnam long-term. He asked an Italian friend to find him a place to learn Vietnamese. This friend introduced Pim to Quyen.

Initially, Quyen was attracted to the Italian guy. It wasn't until she met Pim that she "changed her focus" because she found him humble, very reserved around women, and with a sharp, intelligent face.

Previously, Quyen only liked older men, while Pim was 5 years younger than her. "At that time, I just let my emotions guide me, and I hadn't defined a long-term relationship," Quyen said.

"I was the one who pursued him first. But at the time, he was interested in another girl I also knew. Once, he asked me to hint to her about his feelings."

But I immediately confessed, 'I like you,' and refused to be just a 'contact person'."

Quyen was outgoing and playful, so she expressed her feelings for Pim many times afterward, but always received rejections.

Later, Quyen accepted that Pim didn't like her and opened her heart to another guy in the group. “When Pim saw that I and he had feelings for each other, he got jealous and re-evaluated his own feelings. Not long after, we became a couple.”

Failed breakups

My Quyen said that she was the one who initiated the relationship and always took the initiative.

Like many couples, especially those from two different cultures, Pim and Quyen's relationship faced many differences that were difficult to reconcile.

In the early years of their marriage, many conflicts seemed insurmountable. They talked about breaking up several times, only to reconcile later, realizing they still loved each other.

At one point, a breakup seemed almost certain because Pim decided to return to Belgium to avoid the Covid-19 pandemic.

“It was early 2020. Although he didn't say it out loud, I sensed that Pim was acting differently in our relationship. I was the one who brought up the breakup first, even though I still loved him. Pim agreed immediately and bought a one-way ticket back to Belgium.”

That year, Quyen's younger brother had an accident, and an epidemic began to break out. So many sad things happened at once, making Quyen feel that it was one of the most difficult periods of her life.

Even though Pim had returned to Belgium, the couple still talked regularly. Sometimes, during a pleasant conversation, Quyen would bring up the topic of getting back together, but Pim always refused.

“At some point, I accepted that he wouldn’t come back to me. We still talked, but I wasn’t sentimental or clingy anymore. I just told Pim how my day went.”

At this point, Pim realized that his love for the Vietnamese girl was still there. Every time he passed by the places they had visited together in Belgium, he would remember his ex-girlfriend. "At that time, I really regretted saying goodbye to her," Pim recounted.

The couple rekindled their relationship with Pim's promise to return to Vietnam as soon as the Covid-19 pandemic ends.

After numerous breakups, the couple still chose to continue their journey together.

The difference lies in how you wash dishes.

Quyen confided that, even now, they still have irreconcilable differences. But their attitudes towards those differences have changed compared to the past.

From the topic of dishcloths to when to get married and when to have children, they had certain disagreements in their viewpoints.

"Just regarding the dishcloth, we both still maintain our opinions and always keep both types of cloths at home. Each of us has our own way of washing dishes that we believe is right."

In 2022, the couple decided to get married after many years of living together. (Wedding photos taken in a "role-swapping" style)

At one point, Quyen was so shocked and upset by her husband's reaction that she considered ending the relationship.

"That time, I was pregnant, but unfortunately, I miscarried when the pregnancy was only a few weeks old. I am a Protestant, and my family is originally from Hue , so we place great importance on religious rituals."

My parents and I agreed to bury the fetus. I told him to go with my parents because I was still in the hospital. But he said he didn't want to go and asked why we had to do that.

I was truly shocked by his reaction. I was so upset that I even shared it with my mother-in-law. She messaged back, saying, 'I know you're sad because you just lost your baby.'

Pim may not be very tactful in her speech, but you must understand that when you marry a foreigner, there will always be cultural differences and differences in how to behave, and this will continue to happen in the future.'

At the time, I still thought she was defending him. But a few days later, I calmly reconsidered and realized she had a point.”

In the past, such differences frequently led to endless arguments between the two. But the longer they lived together, the more they learned to accept each other's differences.

"I gradually realized that there are things I believe to be absolutely right, but others may not see them that way. I will still point out what I think is unreasonable, but not with the intention of forcing the other person to do what I want."

Instead, I changed my perspective. And since I did that, our relationship has been much more peaceful.”

Since deciding to get married two years ago, the couple has agreed that the marriage certificate is not as important as the changes they need to make in order to live happily in their marriage.

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/tu-choi-lam-lien-lac-vien-co-gai-viet-cua-do-chang-trai-bi-kem-5-tuoi-17224101016021521.htm