Having inadvertently told his wife about his ex-girlfriend, he was shocked to realize he'd made a lifelong mistake.

A current partner being jealous of an ex is a frustrating feeling for men and very tiring to explain - Photo: TRAN MAI

Unjustified snide remarks, baseless jealousy, when the current partner hears someone talking about their ex, or accidentally sees on Facebook that their husband/boyfriend's ex is living a fulfilling life.

The 'it's all in the past, tell me about it' scam.

Thanh – my friend from our coffee and drinking sessions – often tells the story of his "foolish mistake" of revealing everything about his ex-girlfriends to his wife.

Thành recalled that during their courtship, his wife repeatedly asked about his ex-girlfriend, but he "resolutely refused to reveal anything." Throughout that period, Thành was pressed many times: "Is there something you're hiding, something shady that you won't tell us?" But he maintained his stance: "I came to you and am completely devoted to you. My ex-girlfriend is my past, and has nothing to do with our relationship. I hope you will respect that."

Those firm and reasonable words stifled his wife's curiosity during their courtship. Their beautiful romance was uneventful until they got married. Both had stable jobs and were mature enough to build a peaceful home.

But then it wasn't just a breeze, but a prolonged storm when he foolishly believed his wife was only asking out of curiosity.

"When my wife was pregnant with our first child, we were so close, and her playful behavior caught me off guard. First, she asked how many ex-boyfriends I had. When I didn't answer, she said she was just curious for fun, but now that we have a child, we trust each other completely," Thanh recounted.

So Thành recounted his five previous relationships before marrying his wife. Somehow, his wife successfully "coached" him, revealing in great detail all five of his ex-girlfriends. And even though Thành no longer had any information about his exes, his wife still managed to find each of their Facebook profiles.

From then on, the past lay dormant in Thanh's heart, but awakened in his wife's heart. Every day she would check the Facebook profiles of her husband's ex-girlfriends. She was often furious when she saw that these ex-girlfriends were all talented and had extremely fulfilling lives.

"I don't know why she's jealous. She's been jealous since she was pregnant with our first child, and now that our second one is four years old, my wife still occasionally sends her ex-boyfriend's Facebook profile whenever one of them posts a happy status or picture. One mistake, a lifetime of suffering, you know," Thành joked.

Even the jealousy was "thank goodness" when Thanh's wife realized she wasn't as capable as his ex-girlfriends. During everyday disagreements, she would taunt him: "Yeah, I'm nothing compared to your ex-girlfriends. They must regret marrying this incompetent man."

Once, Thanh laughed at that baseless jealousy. His wife saw it and immediately flew into a rage: "I hit the nail on the head, didn't I? You said you didn't care about your ex, but you must miss her terribly now, you must be full of regret."

Thành said that even with ten mouths, he couldn't explain it, because no matter what he explained, his wife had already assumed the answer. Thành jokingly said that he's now a hostage in his marriage, not daring to talk back or argue, because he's too afraid of his wife bringing up her ex.

"Now I obey my wife's orders without question, but every now and then I still get statuses from her ex with messages like, ' Looking so talented and attractive, you must be regretting it terribly.'" To avoid a major conflict, Thanh urgently resorted to flattery, inviting her out to eat, or immediately sending her a few million dong...

The advice from those whose current partners are jealous of their exes is: don't be foolish enough to tell your current partner about your ex - Photo: TRAN MAI

"You know that girl, right? I know, don't deny it."

Thành's story brought a good laugh to the entire table, but almost everyone had experienced this kind of mishap. Even one of his friends was a journalist. His situation was even more tragic, as he had foolishly used both his and his ex-girlfriend's surnames as his pen name during their relationship.

The name is etched in the readers' minds, it can't be changed. So every time the rice gets burnt, his wife says: "Yes, how can I argue with a great journalist... such a beautiful and meaningful name, such a passionate love story."

That pseudonym "suspended" the unfortunate husband's life on the choppy waves during each of his perilous journeys at sea.

Viên recounted the story of his current girlfriend being jealous of his ex. Viên was the last unmarried member of a group of about ten friends. He was just as fed up as the married men. Viên was handsome and had a good job, so many girls were interested in him.

Now 36 years old, Vien has set a date for a "year-end wedding" with his current girlfriend, but his past relationships and rumors still cause him headaches. His girlfriend is 10 years younger than him; they met when she returned to her hometown from a big city for work. Vien says she's the most suitable person he's ever met, and he wants to marry her.

Unfortunately, fate played a cruel trick; somehow, Yuan's girlfriend ended up sitting opposite his ex-girlfriend, doing the same job. Everyone found out and started teasing them. From then on, a storm brewed, and Yuan's girlfriend "testified," demanding that all her ex-boyfriends be revealed so she wouldn't be "shocked."

What's wrong with being handsome? Even though Vien has "confessed" to everyone without exception, his girlfriend, who works and interacts with many people, frequently hears rumors like, "Vien used to date this girl or that girl." Each time this happens, she texts him, "You knew that girl, didn't you? I know, don't deny it."

"You know what? Since Tet (Lunar New Year), I've gained six more ex-girlfriends based on rumors I heard about them," Vien said, clutching his head, while his friends burst into laughter.

The whole group started brainstorming how Vien should deal with his girlfriend, explaining things logically. Because women don't care about the truth, they care about how clever they are. We sobered up from our beer, discussed until we dispersed, and realized that out of 16 of us, 14 were being unreasonably jealous of their exes by their current partners. Everyone was fed up with their current partners being jealous of their exes, even though they hadn't done anything wrong. Everyone felt immense pressure because of this issue.

What do you think about the fact that you or your spouse still show signs of missing a past relationship? Do you consider interacting with an ex to be normal? Please share your story and feelings by sending it to tto@tuoitre.com.vn. Tuoi Tre Online thanks you.

Source: https://tuoitre.vn/trot-ke-cho-vo-ve-nguoi-yeu-cu-giat-minh-biet-dai-mot-doi-20240327142135238.htm