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Heal in private, don't turn it into a big trend

Báo Tuổi TrẻBáo Tuổi Trẻ11/04/2024


Tôi không khuyến khích việc tự mình chữa lành cho mình. Nhưng mỗi người trẻ chúng ta cũng cần nhìn nhận chính xác vấn đề của mình - Ảnh minh họa: Winch

I do not encourage self-medicating. But each of us young people also needs to look at our own problems accurately - Illustration: Winch

When I shared the story of "feeling hurt, feeling sick", or "feeling like I have a problem", I thought my friends would react.

People who truly want to heal often choose peace.

I live in Hoi An so I know a lot of foreigners, mostly Korean, Japanese..., who decided to come to Hoi An to live for a long time hoping to find peace of mind.

They are under pressure from life and work in industrialized countries; many suffer from war syndrome. Some are also psychologically damaged by shocks in life and most want to find a quiet place to contemplate on their own, completely separate from relationships.

And these people often live very quietly. They choose to read books, meditate, do yoga; some do charity work, do subsistence farming. What these people have in common is that they are discreet, always smiling and welcoming all strangers wherever they go.

And I also rarely see anyone reveal their true purpose in choosing Hoi An is to heal. Simply, they do not want anyone to know they are lonely and sad. This is different from the people who talk a lot about "healing" nowadays on the internet.

Why do we hear the word “healing” more often lately? It is especially puzzling that I see young people tending to “seek peace and have a need for healing” more.

People with mental illness and psychological shock need healing. But strangely enough, many of my friends don’t even have jobs and rely on their parents and relatives. But they regularly attend classes like meditation and yoga for healing.

Correctly identify the problem you have

Sometimes I still have psychological problems. Work is tiring, economic pressure, money, relationships make me exhausted and want to give up. I can never forget the years when I first graduated and started working. All the dreamy sky about work collapsed when I touched reality.

My boss scolded me, saying that parents in the countryside had too high expectations of their children. I had my own worries and couldn’t share them. Only those who came from the countryside knew how hard it was for parents to raise a child to go to university. So when they graduated, the children had a lot of pressure to repay their parents.

My parents don’t ask for anything, but through our daily conversations, I know they are very poor. I always say good things about my job and my income to make my parents in the countryside happy. But that is not the truth.

There was a time when I was so tired that I asked for leave and rode my motorbike to an isolated ethnic village in Krong Pa district, Gia Lai to rest and get away from everything for a while. I cried. For the first time, I felt weak.

Then I suddenly realized that I was weak. People were still living well, still going through everything. I was "losing connection", which meant I was being cowardly and giving up.

I drove back to the city and completely changed myself. I reviewed everything, saw where I went wrong, what was good and bad, and determined to fix it. Everything was brighter and happier than the gloomy, weak past.

I became a completely different person, thinking more simply and courageously. I didn't hide my feelings, I didn't feel "false pride" about my income or my life, but just said what I knew.

I went through a psychological crisis, there was a real problem. The way I healed myself was to be my own doctor. I told myself that I had suffered since I was young, and that I could not give up after coming this far. My parents in the countryside still had a hard life, they worked hard all their lives, my grandparents fought against the French and then went to the battlefield to fight against the Americans, but there was no one to heal them. Why was my grandchild so weak?

I am not advocating self-medication. But each of us young people also needs to look at our own problems accurately.

Tiredness and pressure are just a part of life. Challenges only add value to success and embellish the results, not an excuse to give up and heal.

Don't think of "healing" as something noble. Simply put, the essence of this word is to find a cure for a mental illness. When you have an illness, you hide it, not wanting others to know and worry about it. No one wants others to see you weak and frail. No one would brag about it.

So are we really so "hurt" mentally that we have to make an appointment to find a place to "heal"?

Have you ever wished to be healed? Do you think that the young people's sharing of "wanting to be healed" on social networks is just for fun or reflects their true desire? Please share your opinion at tto@tuoitre.com.vn. Tuoi Tre Online thanks you.



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